𝓐𝓷𝔂𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰, 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮..

FIVE

"I've been cutting.."

-tw, blood, fighting, throwing up, and sh-

-At home-

You collapse on your bed, replaying what happened last night. "Darling," he whispers in your ear, "I will find you, and when I do, I will fuck you till your numb, then beat you so I can see how pretty you look bruised." He chuckles, but he's cut off by a blonde pulling him away from you.

"Fuck off and die prick!" Tommy yells and he hits him in the stomach, the guy falls to the ground, hard. You look up at Tommy, blood dripping from his lip. "Tommy, your lip." You say, concerned. "I don't care, are you ok?" You stare into his ocean blue eyes, him staring back into yours. "Y-y-yeah, I-uh-I'm better, uh- now.." You stutter, you're never great with talking to people, let alone your crush. "Well good.." He says breathless, you realize how close you are, you stay here for a few seconds, till someone yelling breaks yours and Tommy's attention.

"TOMMY! Y/N! ARE YOU OK?!" Toby screams, running towards the two of you. "Uh, yeah, I think we doing better now." Tommy brushes the hair out of his face. "Well I'm glad." Mark says, smiling softly. It's strangely chilly out today, you can see your breath in the poorly lit streets. "Well come on! Wil's waiting, and he gets angry for gone too long, maybe it's an old man thing."

You start to walk with everyone. "I'm gonna tell Wil you said that, Tubbs." "OH YOU BETTER NOT!! TOMAS SIMONS! IF YOU DO, I WILL GET REVENGE!" Toby turns around angrily. You laugh, 'What did he want? to fuck me?' You slowly sink deeper into your thoughts, and Tommy notices. "Remember, if you ever need help, no matter the time, you can call me." Tommy whispers, his breath on your neck makes you shiver. "Thanks Tommy." You look up at him, smiling. "You can call me Toms."

"Alrighty then, Toms." You say, putting an emphasis on Toms. You snap back to the room, feeling, gross.
You went to the bathroom and locked the door.

-tw, sh and eating disorder-

You stare at yourself in the mirror, looking at all of the flaws. A disposable razor catches your eye, you've done this a million times before, you take out a razor, and roll up your sleeves, a bunch on lines were evenly spaced out across your arms. You take the razor and slice into your skin, you wince at the pain, and continue a few more times. Blood drips down your arm, and into your hand, you wash the cuts and roll down your sleeves.

You glare at your stomach, you gained weight since you arrived, you eyes fix at the toilet. 'Fat ass, fatzo, be skinnier, be prettier, you fucking ugly fat whore, Tommy will NEVER date a fat pig like you, he's too handsome, you dumbass.' Your thoughts echoed through your head, you open the toilet seat and prepare yourself for what your going to do.

You force two fingers down your throat and vomit. When you finish, you lean back, hands shaking. You clean everything up before anyone can find out what happened.

-end of tw-

You contemplate on calling Toms, when your phone rings and you pick it up. "Yello?" "Y/n? Are you ok? Your voice is raspy.." Shit, Tommy. "Uh, Y-yeah, I'm fine." You hated lying, it could start out with a simple white lie and end up spiraling into a huge secret that you can't tell anyone. "Y/n, you're lying, please tell me what's wrong?" You can hear worry in his voice. " I, uh," You pause, "I haven't been doing too great Toms." You admit, a wave of guilt washes over you. "Why? What's wrong? Is it that guy from last night? Are you in danger? Are you hurt? Do you need to call 999?" "No, I'm not in any real danger.."
"Well then what's wrong? Please tell me."

I could hear the plead in his voice, 'I have to tell him.' "Toms?" You ask. "Yes, Y/n?" You take a deep breath, "I've been cutting.."

A/n- FUCKING FINALLY!! A! NEW! CHAPER!! sorry it's so short, I've been on a mental health break because my mental health is crap, drama with friends that type of shit, anyway, thank you for reading😌 and pretty please eat and drink something today.. do it or I'll take your kneecaps
☺️🪓 alright, that MIGHT, be all for today, LOVE YA BAIIIIII!! (word count 761)