We had just gotten into the car to go on a date he had planned at the park. We were going to have a picnic together. Of course, I should have known, things were going too good to be true. Jungkook had gotten a call on his phone he answered it. I watched as his face turned annoyed.
"Alright, I'll be there soon." He says into the phone before hanging up.
Of-fucking-course.
"I'm sorry my girl. Something came up at work." Jungkook tells me.
"Can't you just let them deal with it?" I desperately ask.
"Don't act stupid, Lucia. I have to go there." Jungkook tells me.
"Okay, I'm sorry." I say before sadly unbuckling my seatbelt and opening the car door. I grab the picnic basket and close the door. I went to walk away and back inside but stopped when Jungkook called my name.
"Lucia!" He said, getting my attention. I turned back around and looked at my boyfriend. "Trust me, I'll make it up to you later. I love you." He told me.
"Love you too." I say with a sad smile before I walk back inside.
<3
I sit in my bed, the room was dark except for the light coming from the television and the moonlight coming in through the window. The bedroom door opened and I looked over to see Jungkook tiredly come inside. He wasn't the only one that was tired though, out of anger I had ran on the treadmill pretty much the same as I did yesterday.
I watch as he silently gets undressed before walking into his closet. After a minute or two he comes out in a t-shirt and sweatpants. Jungkook crawls into the bed next to me.
"Don't think I forgot about making it up to you." He whispers against my neck.
smut oncoming;)
He then starts to gently kiss my neck. He slowly crawls on top of me and starts to kiss up my jawline and to my lips. We both kiss one another, my kisses were full of need and sadness while his were full of lust and love. I run my fingers through Jungkook's hair as we made-out with one another.
"I'm so lonely." I whisper against his lips.
He doesn't answer at first, he just deepens the kiss after I say that. After a little while though, he answers, "I know." Is all he says though.
"Get undressed." Jungkook quietly tells me as he pulls away from me. I do as he says as I watch him get undressed as well. He's also watching me.
He gets on top of me again, "I love you." He tells me before placing a peck on my lips. Jungkook then lets himself enter inside of me.
an: dw she's on birth control and is not gonna get pregnant
He starts to grind against my hips, letting out soft groans as I moan against his chest. I was sad and tired; tired mentally and emotionally. It wasn't even just about the stuff happening with Jungkook it was just my depression, it was worse.
My hands ran down his back muscles as Jungkook continued to fuck me. I don't even know what came over me, I guess I had just held it all in for too long that I burst because my moans had turned into tears. I started off by crying gently but it quickly turned into my sobbing.
Jungkook had stopped once he had seen me start to even cry. At first he thought it was because he was hurting me but once I started to cry harder he knew it was something more. Jungkook pulled out of me before he pulled me up to hug him. I wrapped my arms around him as I started to sob even harder against his bare skin.
"Get dressed my girl." Jungkook softly tells me.
We both get up and I continue to sob as I get dressed. I crawl back into bed before Jungkook slowly crawls in after me. He doesn't say anything he just pulls me on top of him. I sob against his chest, I knew I was making his shirt wet from my tears but both of us weren't worried about that.
"I'm tired of this." I whisper.
"What?" Jungkook asks.
"I'm tired of this." I say louder.
"Of what?" Jungkook slowly asks.
No, I wasn't breaking up with him. I just wanted him to know how I felt.
"Of your lifestyle, of you being gone and never being able to see you, of us barely being able to hangout without something coming up at work, of having to be scared you're gonna get killed or that you're gonna kill someone.. I'm tired of... I'm just... I don't know how much longer I can take this. I'm not saying I'm gonna break up with you.. I'm not tired of you... I'm just tired of this." I say, not looking up at Jungkook once.
Jungkook sighs and it's silent for a moment before speaking, "I'm in too deep. I can't leave." Jungkook tells me.
"But you can." I say. "It's not like you're in the mafia. You're a drug dealer. You can stop. We can both get normal jobs. Live at a normal house. Live normal lives." I suggest. "Please Jungkook." I beg.
I'm now looking up at Jungkook who is looking away from me, "No Lucia." Jungkook tells me.
"Of course." I whisper.
"You need to understand my point of view." Jungkook tells me.
"No, I get it.. I get why you would say this and why you're acting like this. It's cool." I say before lifting my head off my boyfriend's chest and going to move away.
"No, Lucia. Stop." Jungkook says, pulling me back down against him. "I love you and I understand you but It's truly not that easy. We would be broke." He says.
"But we wouldn't. We would have the money from the business to help us get a new place. Getting a job won't be hard for me, I went to college. You can get a job as well, you went to college too. You can." I say.
"I don't want to though." Jungkook sternly tells me.
I just look at him in disappointment. At the same time, I still managed to understand him and where he was coming from.
"I see." I sadly say before I turn away from Jungkook.
Jungkook lets me just lay there without him and fall asleep.
<3
I had woken up in the middle of the night to Jungkook's arms wrapped tightly around my torso as he slept against me. This morning though, I woken up and he was gone.
I was just waiting for the day for him to be gone forever.
I didn't want it. Of course I didn't. I would always love him. But he's so naive and emotional. With his luck, something would happen where he'd get mad and he'd either get killed or in big, big, trouble.
With his lifestyle, it was something that was bound to happen.
.
word count: 1198
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