chap 30- Betrayal
He arrived at the orphanage next morning. Rati met him again but this time she broke down as soon as she saw Aryan.
"She knew you will come, she told me to give you this last two letters. I cannot tell you anything more than that" while sobbing she handed the letters and ran inside.
Aryan wanted to read them in private setting, so he hurried and booked a hotel room nearby. He had gut wrenching feeling since he saw Rati.
He opened the letters and read it contents. After reading, he sat there frozen. Biggest betrayal. How can she? Without thinking he broke everything in the room and fell on his knees
he hids his face in the hands and cried out. "Why Imlie, you betrayed me you are a liar you never loved me" he was grinding his teeth in anger.
He left the letters in room and left . One of the letters read:
My mad Aru,
This is the second last letter and they will be my most hardest letters. I promise after these there will be no more.
Did you realize what my each letter represented? It represented 7 stages of love from my view. Yes Aru, it was so apt for the life i am having.
I wanted to leave you with my thoughts not just pictures to remember me by. The last two stages are madness and death.
Madness i have for you its untreatable. I laugh when i write this because its so unseemingly of me. I am mad for you.
You know when i realized my madness for you? The Party i brought Ved with me, he had been giving me creepy feeling for beginning i took a chance that night and bought him with me to the party..
you know why? So you can get jealous as jealous as i was when i saw you with Anya. Isn't that madness?
Nobody knows this and i reveal to you today, i did stalk you little bit whenever you were in Mumbai just to see your face. Nothing creepy sort.
My madness for you is so much that day i broke up with you. It started as joke remember i texted you i will divorce you i was just messing with you even though i was really mad but i could never leave you in my imagination.
But they say na never say never? I know you would come to pacify me and i would be easily give in and we would have gone our way.
I have been having pain in stomach, i hid it from you yes madness again my assumption not to bother you because i thought it was minor
I got another pang of pain when i saw babusaheb yes i met him and told him i never want to see him and that i love only you Aru. See madness again.
My last madness was when you came to beach and i had decided to separate because i got a call about my reports. I have uterine cancer, but it was very well advanced.
They wanted me to start therapy. At first i thought i will do it while you were away in UAE but i know eventually i will have to face you and i could not tell you because i know your reaction.
Madness again. I cannot see you devastated, i thought while i stay separated from you i will do therapy and if it works out i will come back in your life and somehow we would be back.
Even though it would take me 100 years i would have pacified you somehow but it didn't go as planned.
You saw me in Mussourie first time after we parted I been there for my therapy they have one of the best hospitals.
You saw me changed? my hair,my clothes yes it wasnt your Imlie. I don't have any hair Aru. It was a wig, clothes because it was easier for me to wear those - i had became too weak.
Long sleeves hiding the IV Scars and Injections Scars plus i already had acid scars. But it was still me.
I wanted to run wrap my legs around your waist and hug you but i couldn't . I kept patience maybe soon i will see you but this time forever.
My therapy has relapsed. Cancer has metasized,i cannot take this pain anymore i do have much time left anyways.
I thought i will quietly leave and maybe by the times you got these letters i might not be here anymore.
Hence i wrote these letters to pour my heart out. Madness, Madness and only Imlie can do this Madness. Please handle yourself , am a coward not able to tell you and just leave.
Please take care of yourself Aru and promise me you will move on.. I am tired i will continue you in the last letter.
I love you and always will"
The last letter: Death
My Akdu,
I love you I love you I love you and its not enough how much i say it. I want to see you before i go.
I don't know if i have strength left anymore to bear this alone. I feel selfish now that i revealed to you towards the end.
I might be gone by the time you get these letters. I don't want to die alone Aru am scared. I cry everyday to thinking about you which makes the it works for my therapy .
But i don't care anymore , I saw you other day you looked so good Aru and i was happiest when you didn't smoke.
I cannot thank you enough. I have hurt dad in this process I am really sorry my sorry isn't enough for what i have done.
But it was necessary I didn't want dad to be hurting his weak heart would not have able to take it. To see his daughter in this state it would have broken him Aru.
I hope you understand . Please understand I didn't want to hurt Dad. I am sure you must have been most hurt because i hurt dad and it must have even dislike me.
Please don't hate me anymore, at least you cannot be with me but give me satisfaction that you still love me I can die more peacefully.
Rati knows where I am, if you still love me I want to see you given am still alive. And if you do come please don't mind my appearance. Am not same anymore physically.
But am same Imlie it was façade last year. You see death can scare the most bravest person i thought i was brave i thought would never tell you and just disappear eventually from your life as you move on .
I Love you and always will, i will always be there for you when you feel the breeze kissing your cheeks, be assured its me kissing you.
When you feel the hair on your neck stand, don't worry it wasn't a unfamiliar ghost. It will be me hugging you from behind.
Death is the last stage for everything and my end is here. I hope i can see you, i don't want to die alone. One kiss , one hug that is all i need.
I love you and always will. I know i have lost right but today i will say it punish me if you must but bolne do aaj-
Yours and only Yours forever Imlie.
There was lipsticked lip on the letter as token for Aryan to remember her by.
The papers were on the floor still hour later Aryan came back and kissed it. He went out to get a breather.
He was feeling suffocating before he goes see her he wanted this letter. He kissed the lips on the letter and neatly tucked in his pocket.
He will not let her go that's it. He will not-Imlie has to pay for this for that she has to be here with him.
He had brought her favorite shirt luckily. He put on white shirt for her, he button his shirts while tears dropped.
His white shirt was visibly wet here and there because of tears.
He cannot imagine his life without her or nor he wants to am sure there must be something. She cannot give up like this, he thought.
This is the hardest thing he has ever done in life. He then went to Rati to get the address.
"I won't let you betray me Imlie . You cannot betray me and leave. I won't let you" talking to himself .
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