The love sonnet

Mutti*, Part 1

I love Hans so much - he is my sohn* after all! I don't want him to feel hurt. Klaus, my husband and Hans' father, is often hard on Hans. "Be more like a man," he says, "You dumnkopf*! How will writing in a stupid poetry book contribute to the war efforts?"

I can't always challenge Klaus' methods. I mean, sure, they might be a...little rough. However, it is for the war effort.

That's how Klaus is, and that's how Klaus has always been. Our relationship has never been easy - we used to be good friends back in school, and when I met his father, he did the exact same thing. He toughened up Klaus the same way Klaus is trying to do with Hans. Despite this, I love him through all of it.

The memory of Hans receiving the poetry book remains crystal clear in my mind. Klaus didn't approve of my christmas gift to Hans as he was very focused on the war effort and "turning Hans into a man" as he would put it.

Despite hating the poetry book as a gift, he, too, loved literature as a schoolboy. His father didn't approve of him liking literature and spending time around it. One night when Klaus wasn't home, he burnt his books in a bonfire. He arrived home later in the evening to find his bookshelf replaced with a weight training station, and he was never the same since then.

I always tried to be strong for Hans. It was no easy feat, but I knew that it was I who kept the family together, and it was a tough but essential task.

I didn't want Hans to feel hurt because of his Vati*. When Klaus and I got married, it wasn't up to us. He treated me badly, very quickly expecting things like children, and for me, as his wife, to carry out all the household chores. I eventually submitted to him, because whenever I didn't, I would have to suffer the consequences.

"Warum sottest der ihm so ein Geschenk machen?"

And that's how it always has been.

"Er muss dafür ausgebildet werden, eines Eages Hitler zu dienen"

That's how it always will be.

"wie sol ihm das helfen?"

And I don't wish the same for Hans.

The next morning, Hans was out in a rush. It was a stressful morning as it was the first day of training for the new recruits. As I watched him quickly march out of the house, I saw a boy risking his life for Germany. I softly smiled as he said "Auf Wiedersehen, Mutti, dich lieben!"*

* "Auf Wiedersehen, Mutti, dich lieben!" -"Bye mom, love you!"