I am a girl of a very rich family; never short of money and highely respected however things weren't always that easy. I can only remember it vaguely but when i was a child there was man. Who would come in to see my Grandma and parents. He appeared as a slim man with a coat and a hat. He was very mysterious and always had a very pensive look on his face. Whenever he speak his words were articulate and the way he stood showed confidence. He also had a very fine demenor like he was of the highest of royalty. Anyway, he saw me one time next to my mother holding her hand and shielding myself from him as i was a very shy girl. He noticed I was hiding behind my mother and he made a mention of me saying "hi, don't be shy little girl". This only made me recoil into my mother even more. Then he made an unexpected gesture he had a business man bag with locks on it. I had only seen those bags once before I remember my dad had one. He would always come back home totally wrecked by work. He would come home and he show me his bag and it had my very own first porcelain doll. My dad hated his job always moaning and groaning that he had to go to work. So he asked me to draw him a picture and i draw a picture of me and him together at the beach. I remember him saying, that is picture got him through the day at work. Now my dad was black smith so he made the finest of jewellery which was why our family was so well off. He also had to fill out orders and make sure there was enough stock. The man stood there fumbling his locks in his business bag and he got out a doll not just any doll but a princess one. He hand this home made beauty that must have been made by some very skillfull hands as it had embroidery on it. The hair was braided and her dress was beautiful torquise blue. She was stunning and I felt warm from the very nice gesture he had made. However I was still next to my mother, still as a stone my mother reassured me that it was okay and that he wasn't going to bite. So I slowly moved from my mother and he saw my blue eyes and then my brunette hair infront of my eyes. In a slow gesture knelded down and brushed my hair out of my eyes with one thumb. This somehow made me feel cheerful and made me trust the man infront of me. As I wasn't someone for trusting strangers normally and that was how my family liked it. I was very wise and cautious for my age. He handed me my dolly and gave me a sincere and warm loving hug. Exactly how my dad used to and he asked me to take good care of this dolly and she was very special. She even had a very beautiful name. She was named after the Goddess Hina who was the goddess of beauty and freedom. He told me that and then he picked up his coat and left. That was the last time I saw the man.
He left and aftewards I cheerfully moved to my room and put my dolly back with the others. Or should this dolly be showcased in mantel in front of the mirror that my dad bought me? No I put her on my bed and I decided she was my extra special dolly for my dreams. Later that day my dad came home and i was excited to tell him about the mysterious man that had given me this beautiful doll. My dad came home and as per usual he looked exhausted and overworked. He gave a gentle, featherly kiss to my mother greeting her friendly and briefty filling her in on the events of the day. "Oh and this guy he had so many ideas and couldn't decide on the jewellery he kept changing his mind at the last moment, I swear i spent the whole damn day trying to make his jewellery just as he liked. It was horrible I hope one day my clients aren't as indecisive as him. My mother Genevieve was just nodding and smiling rubbing his shoulders; with a very nice smelling cream that filled the house with a wonderful aroma. This relaxed him a bit more and he continued complaining about the other events that day
"So this guy with this horrible smelling boots just put them on the floor making the whole place like freaking fish!, oh bloody hell fishermans kill me!".
"Oh but they give good money" mum said. "Oh i know but i wish i could just quit this job and he a lawyer or something, no i wish i had more time to spend with Cassandra" this warmed me up. If dad was staying at home more often I'd be having more fun with him and I'd get to have a lunch date with all my dolls and him. This thought filled me up and as he was still chatting and complaining about work. I went to jump on the bed. My mother goes "oh Cassandra don't sneak up on people!"
"Oh but mummy i want to show daddy my new dolly!"
My dad chackles and goes "it's okay she's excited now show us this new doll you have"
"Look this is Hina, she was given to me by this nice man". I said holding her up and smiling at my dad
"She's beautiful my sweet pea" dad replied
All of sudden easing up as he seemed tense before.
My mother gives me a smile and tells me to put her away and too start making my way for bed as it was 8:pm already.
My mother then dressed me and then she got me to brush my teeth. Which she then tucked me into bed and told me a story about a girl named Rapunzel.
I gave up and I surrended into a deep and peaceful sleep. That night was my first encounter...
I woke up, I was lucid dreaming. On a celestial gateway to the universe; i could see the milky way. The colour were beautiful so many hues of violets, blues, reds. I felt like I was astral travelling through time and space all in my sleep. Then the dream altered and all of a sudden I was falling back to earth. Closer and closer spinning and spinning back to earth. I saw England and i remember my grandma family were English and were renessiance fighter, misfits but extremely intelligent. A few of them were judges; in the high courts. I remember my grandma telling me about this bad man in the family that did horrible things and how he caught her alone, and wanted to do unspeakable horrible things. I asked her what she was talking about and she paused. Saying i was too young to understand. I didnt let it go however, I kept on enquiring but each time she'd go colder and colder as if afraid of something. ..
As i was falling back i noticed the city dublin as it always looked historical and filled with wonderful landmarks and busy roads.
I finally landed, and I noticed my surrounding areas. Until something in the distance fascinated me and left me thinking is that my... no it can't be. It was my Grandma but she appeared to be a bit younger.
She was dressed in very embellished clothing with an alternative fashion and flair. She looked kind of like a rebel and it made me stare in awe; as i had always remembered my Grandma to be a very smooth and gentle woman wearing nothing but florals and bright colours. She was dressed in high black boots with black tights and a red leather skirt with a red laced up corset with black laces going criss cross.
She looked like a very tough person in that attire she was with others dressed more, freakish and alternative there was even a guy next to her with black lipstick the shame!
She seemed to be chanting something to do with equal rights and the government taxing the heck out of the residents and the lower class people. She looked angry and fierce; like she could cut someone.
I remember thinking wow this is my Grandmother as a teenager! Holy hell the fashion may have changed but her fiery personality still remained, i guess something things never changed...
I remember waking up from that dream and there was a strange ambience in my room. It was like waking up from someone else's memories... This dream was not how dreams usually are... but it didn't feel like i was in control either. It just felt... i don't know... real
Getting speedly out of my bed to get dressed in my school attire. Which is a very professional. I put my blue shirt and button it up. Then I put on my tights and my blue skirt, then I put my blazer.
I never understood why I needed such professional clothing to go to primary school.
I guess my parents, liked me being teased because i looked like rich bitch. I was always pretty sure they were jealous of the fact that I went to one of the most expensive schools for riding horses.
