(it indeed is, enjoy lovelies😘)
I sit outside of Ryan's office, trying my hardest not to let my tears slip; teachers walk past every now and then, some ask if I'm ok, some don't. When people ask i give them a slight nod and give them the "yeah, all fine, just feeling super anxious" which isn't far from the truth. They always leave after that.
Sigh.
Eventually ryan walks out of his office and sees me.
"Nico, whats up?" he asks, looking at me with concern
"Can we talk?" he nods and we walk 0to his office after I pick up my bag. He shuts the door behind us and sits in his chair; "So.. Whats up?" Ryan asks again, i just sit on his lap and let all my emotions loose, crying heavily.
Ryan wraps his arms around me tightly, begging me to tell him why I'm crying. My breathes start getting shallower as i get lost deeper in my thoughts; it feels like someones sitting on my chest, its awful. "Panic" i shake as i try to catch my breath, talking hurts, "attack" i finally manage to say. Struggling to breath, i try pulling myself even closer to him, trying to hide.
He removes his arms that were wrapped around my back gently, as not to disturb me; he lifts me off his lap and stands up, placing me on his off chair he leaves. I pull my knees up to my chest and try my breathing techniques. He comes back with a water bottle in hand; putting it on the desk infront of me.
He starts rubbing circles and my back and whispering words of assurance, and letting me know everything was going to be ok slowly i manage to calm down slightly; enough to grab the bottle of water off the desk and take a sip.
"Ok soo uhh, maybe i should explain"
I tell him about how my household isn't the best, and that me and my mom fought, and i told him all the ways my family makes me feel insecure about stuff. After i finish talking he just stares at me in disbelief and then tightly wraps his arms around me; i take a deep breathe in feeling safer than i have in a while.
"I'm so so sorry, that must be awful to deal with.. Is there anyway i could help?"
I shake my head "thats very kind of you though, thank you. You really didn't have to comfort me". We fall into a comfortable silence for a couple minutes before he lets go of me and stands up.
"I know something that could cheer you up" I look up at him my face turning red "No, no, not what you're thinking"
Ryan grabs my hands and forces me out of his comfy office chair so that im standing on the floor in front of him. Ryan switches our spots and starts typing something into his computer blocking it from my view. A few seconds after i start to hear quiet classical music playing; i raise a questioning eyebrow at him "whats this?".
"Care to dance?"
Ryan out stretches a hand and bows slightly, i take his hand and giggle at his ridiculousness. He rests his arms on my shoulders and i rest mine on his waist, our height difference becoming much more obvious. We dance imperfectly, just swaying along to the music; i rest my head against his chest as we continue to sway. This may be the sweetest thing that has ever happened to me.
One of ryans hands trails up my neck into my black messy hair, playing with it gently. I let out a content sigh and smile into his chest.
(this is a bit lazy but its the longest ive ever written on one of these chapters so far so enjoy!:) )
