Voice

What does it mean to have a voice and how do you use it? I'm not just talking about producing sound out of your mouth either. What I'm actually referring to is the ability to use your words to get your message across! Now that you have a little bit more information on the question I will ask it again, what does it mean to have a voice and how do you use it? Those are the questions I asked myself everyday growing up. I still ask myself this question but just in different ways nowadays. For example, "How can I use my voice to make people's days better," or, "How can I help people not feel alone anymore and help them find their place and motivation?"

Growing up I was a small farm town kid who grew up where generations of my family before me grew up. My household growing up was great other than your usual family frustrations and small arguments which I'm sure there are people who relate to that! I myself was a shy child in the classroom and I started noticing through the years of going through school I tended to lean more towards a followers path than a leader. Thankfully I had/have amazing friends who didn't let the following become a part of me. They wanted to know what I thought, how I felt, what I wanted to do. To this day and probably the rest of my life I will cherish that gift they gave me and helped me realize what I have. What I have is something that I know everyone has and that is a voice.

High school was a trying time for me and a lot of other people as well. I let myself hide behind this shell that would submit to any form of dominance outside of my friend group. This caused so many insecurities in myself that just made it even worse. Eye contact with others was completely nonexistent and I wouldn't dare to speak to someone I've never spoken to because that would be catastrophic and the end of the world.  Day to day I went to school, did my work, practiced my trombone and then worked an after school job.

Senior year did eventually come and I became more confident, probably more in the sense that high school became second nature. Almost the same teachers every year and almost the same students every year with a huge mix of people I just didn't get acquainted with because meeting new people without an introduction from someone else was just out of my comfort zone. But at that point in time I was really finding myself as a person. Then the questions started rolling in. What are you doing after graduation?

That was the most vomit inducing question you could ask a lot of seniors in high school. For myself in particular I never admitted to my teachers that I wanted to be a writer in the future. I wanted to create, inspire and build communities of people who are passionate for the future but also passionate for the futures of others as well. In high school I was too embarrassed to say that this is what I wanted to do because I feared other peoples voice over believing in my own voice.

Graduation for myself happened in the year 2018 and before my college journey could even begin I dropped the idea of it. Financially it wasn't the best decision for my future sadly even though I dreamed of going to college and never thought I could make it in this big world without the help of a degree under my belt. So after that meltdown I continued working at a local chain grocery store until covid-19 hit and everything shut down. Things were going okay other than the fear of bringing something home to my family as I continued to work. Soon after this started it was decided that later that year in October they would be shutting down the store where I worked. Sadly because of Union policies if I was to not accept a job at a different location it would consider me voluntarily leaving the services of the store therefore breaking any chance of unemployment while I figured out what my next moves were. 

So as the store had its final days I began to start my new career working in a nursing home facility that was used for long and short term care. I worked there up till February of 2022 when I decided for my own mental health that I needed to take on a PRN role. Excitedly I'm now taking this opportunity to show the world my voice that I have found in myself. I'm streaming full time on twitch and joining new communities where I'm finding amazing people who feel very strongly about bringing smiles and happiness to their viewers and even their friends. Besides that I'm working more passionately on my dream of becoming a writer and an influencer that is going to inspire and bring more happiness into the world.  

Now answer the question for me: do you have a voice? The only answer that you should be giving is yes you do! Everyone has their voice and especially you! It's time to look in the mirror and tell yourself that you have a voice that has power, passion and a positive goal for not just others around you but also yourself. The first step that needs to be taken is letting your voice inspire you. Get excited about it and let the world know that your voice has entered the chat and it's time that you start doing the things that make you happy and start becoming the person you want to be. If you fear that you may have no support just know that I support you and know that you can do this. It's time that we take on the world and start bringing hope, happiness and kindness with the power of our voices.