Yes ok I'm standing here again, alone ... and don't know what to do ... how am I supposed to cope? with substances that destroy me?. with alcohol? and then throw up all the pain?. not eating anymore because I feel fat and uncomfortable? ...
what was my goal ... my goal was not to get out of the clinic and to be that ... I know that i almost killed myself through dr0gz .... dude..I know you don't want to anymore. .I know how difficult you are ... you think you are going the right way? but is it still fun? .. or is it getting worse? Can you get away from it?
You don't like ambulances, I know my angel ... I know you don't like the day ... but you can still remember ... maybe not quite everything that is understandable but you felt it ... you have your mother next to you seen you who struggled to keep you alive .....what would have happend if you hadn't told her..would you still be here? ... i don't want to imagine ...
you got help ... and she called the ambulance ... but as you were about to leave, your mum helped you into the car and your step dad drove to the hospital at high speed ... your mum was with you the entire drive ... you didn't know what was going on ... it was like a drug ... but knew there were sleeping pills ... lots of sleeping pills ....
the doctors call you right away and they checked everything ... there was no waiting time ... like there was usually war if I heard a leg ... no ... it's all about a lifetime ... just before I stepped away I just saw more than I had something disgusting to drink before I got into the intensive care unit and how quickly I got to breath badly ...
the doctors get some quick tests through and I noticed that I was getting weaker ... and i slowly step away..they tried to keep me awake because I can use the devices ... they wired me ... which helped me to stay alive..I was strong and gave my best ...
the device beeped again and again longer in a different tone, the doctors sat me up and breathe properly with me ... it was a night that I will never forget ... 3 days after I woke up I was weak ... very weak, I see the help bell so that someone can help me to go to the bathroom lock out ...
half an hour later the paramedic came here with a lie, one held my stuff ... I got out of the hospital ... with tears in my eyes I drove through the hospital ... when I was in the ambulance, I looked out of the window and I almost broke apart ... I was about to have another panic attack ... about half an hour later we arrived in another hospital ...
they pushed me through the ambulance to the acute admission of psychiatry ... they sat me on the patient chair..the door hallway and my mum came in..I looked at her..I didn't know what to say to her so I was silent. .
The conversation with the doctors was nothing for me I lied to them just to get out of here, but I had no chance I came into a room, a room a already know, and I knew it's over now..
3 months later I came home and I didn't know what I should tell my friends
I just said I was sick, but no one believed me
.My mum? Yes .. she used the time to lock all medication in a safe ... my father came to visit me on the same day ... I think it was the longest hug I've ever had .. I enjoyed it. ..
I went to school for 2 days and had to pretend everything was okay .. when my best friend saw me she hugged me with tears in her eyes, my classmates laughed at us cause we did like someone almost die
YOU ARE READING
They did't know
Short Storyyou have your mother next to you seen you who struggled to keep you alive .....what would have happend if you hadn't told her..would you still be here?..
