ᴶᵉˢᵖᵉʳ ᶠᵃʰᵉʸ ᴵᵐᵃᵍⁱⁿᵉˢ

ꜱɪᴍᴜʟᴛᴀɴᴇᴏᴜꜱ ɢɪɢɢʟᴇꜱ

a/n - not sure if I really like this one and I don't love the fact that he starts apologising when the reader hurt him, but I feel better about it because it's an older piece el em ay oh

Warnings: alcohol/getting drunk, hangover and a tiny bit of a quirky girl vibe (I'm SO SORRY).

˜"*°•.˜"*°••°*"˜.•°*"˜

It was an intricate thing: love.

It was all things beautiful, like the flowers that bloomed in spring, but so dangerous, like jumping head first into a lake.

It was both things, contrasting in every way possible: love was so pure, many describing it as a light in the darkness, yet, it could be manipulated and used; love was special, so uncommon, but it was so frowned upon, many wondering why people would sacrifice things for their partner; and it was most amazing, as though a rush flooded your thoughts, heart and soul, but so terrifying.

Love was all things daring and risky, and even if Jesper Fahey was daring in all things, and looked 'unbelievably handsome' while doing it, he could not bring himself to confess to you that you were the object of his affections.

Jesper always came to two conclusions when he thought of the concept of love.

The first being, that love could only be described as looming: for better or worse, it would always peek through in situations and make itself known.

It could be dark and twisted, a black cloud of yearning and chaos, writhing internally and storming someone's heart with agonising pain, causing it to papillate in a horrible way.

However, despite this, it could also be so calm, sweet and gentle, a butterfly flapping it's wings ever so softly, everything else standing still to appreciate its individual beauty.

There were so many possibilities for love but Jesper's second conclusion never had anything else branching off it, any disadvantage he could truly recognise. It was singular, at one with all he had inside, and otherwise known as one particular person: you.

His feelings for you were in every beating of his heart, every blink of his lashes and every breath he took.

Love could be an awful mistake, but his love for you was so much more than adoration, or affection - he was in love with you, and as much as he often wistfully wished he could tell you, hopefully stop his pain, he wouldn't change his love for the world.

Even if he could live to regret it.

˜"*°•.˜"*°••°*"˜.•°*"˜

Jesper Fahey threw himself into life. Through parties or clubs, it didn't matter. If there was an event, you could guarantee he'd be there.

You however, did not. You preferred to stay curled up in a hidden nook, a blanket over your lap, fire crackling beside you and the silence only broken by the turning of yellowed pages.

No matter how many papercuts you received, reading was your safety net, allowing you to travel to other realities all while sitting in the Crow Club.

You did not want to escape Ketterdam, per say, rather to invision a temporary place to belong. Feeling at home in the Barrel was always hard, it being the place where nearly all citizens got drunk daily but in your heart, it was always your home.

You may not have felt you were like everyone else, but that did not mean you loved it any less. You did stand out amongst the crowds, the majority of people turning to alcohol when something went wrong, but you would go either to your little reading corner, or to your friends.