solitary heartbeat's

5🌼

Kook closed the book as his beautiful Ocean blue color mold was shedding waters across the soft cheeks. The unwanted feelings inside his tummy was swirling around him. His human body and soul both are now craving for someone who's not his making him shead tears in agony and pain.

Every part of his body was dripped in exhaustation and anxiety. The serious amount of pain inside his heart were boxed inside him was bursted the moment when he come across to his bed. It feels like living without breathing. It give him pain looking at the man he's been loving for so long but the others don't have any idea of how he's been suffering.

Not that jungkook ever tried to confess yet can't he see the love on the latter's eyes?

It's been long for him since he's in love. He shouldn’t call it love neither be as he know's the other will never return his feeling's. It's all one sided thought. A one sided feeling we call painless until you experience it. It's more like you're with that person but not close enough to touch and feel.

Love is hard someone says

"  If you ever want to come across the border of love and wanna drown into the overwhelming sensation, you must have a brine like recess. 

A brine, where lives thousands of different feelings. In the first laer you will find only the burned warmess which he consume from sun, in the next laer you will find so many colourful painted animals inside, in daylight they seems colourful but as time started to wipe away the ray of sun he become dull and in the deepest laer you will find yourself. Where no one is alive but those untold truths you ever want.

Brine who holds everything into him..

Staying and leaving is something we never decide.

It might bleed at first or forever but the pleasure to see your love of life being happy is something no  author can't put in word's in any book's.
It doesn’t matter if you're "that one's "forever but only you know that " that one " is your's forever.

So darling in the long way of life, you might find love once or maybe never. Those precious eight letter's you might or might not utter to them, it doesn’t matter when you know...you know who rules you heartbeat "

Jungkook remember those precious word's he read somwhere but he can't remember. He remember those word's. The golden creamy light from the road's lamppost is illuminating like ever in his room cause currently It's 2 in the morning and kook is not asleep. He's reading a book now that's why while a forever companion of his is now trying to make him feel a lil good warming his throat.

He can't sleep cause he's anxious for no reason. Well, a very much reason we can say. Taehyung and mitoe went to paris on a business trip together.
He's mad at himself cause gosh,they are couple's and they obviously gonna enjoy and It's suffocating kook. It shouldn't be like this.

Jungkook loves him for so long and with his everything that not seeing for a while seems like torture to his soul. He can't figure out why it's always him he's alone... Left. First his parents who left him when he was just a 2 years old baby and now the man who he loves with his every single thing he has. He tried to give everything he has for people he loves but why can't people return it?

Is he not loveable enough?

He tried to slapped those shitty ideas away but no his heart being the bitch decided not to listen to him at all.

He wish he could but the thought of never being on those arms like he wants to be was making his heart bleed and he cried out loud. The loud sob of losing his own self and his heart was so prominent that the whole apartment echoes with sorrows. The utter blackness of night and stars in the sky was hiding him and his heart from public attention and he was glad for it.

He closed his eyes as tears couldn't stop flowing from his eyes making him frustrated over his little heart which is pounding loud in someone eles name.

Why love hurts? Just why?

He pulled his hear trying to erase his thought and memories. Those memories he lived in.
" How to erase you love? How to stop my tears? Please stop beating for someone eles you selfish heart, It's mine then why you are whimpering his name again and again? It Will go away heart. You and me will be fine. Let him go please. He will be nothing but a unwanted part of your life book heart. Please le-let h-him go.M-maybe It's not love, m-ma-y -be we are just illusion bu-t please s-stop beating for my s-sake"

He cried, cried untill his body become numb completely. He cried till all those uninvited pain deep inside his heart where he can't control himself hurts. It's a feeling that no one can feel, no one can understand untill they walk in the same feet.

He slept mumbling" please stop, It's ok "and all those stuffs.

~~
Sorry guys but that's all. I worte this chapter short cuz of some personal problem's and stuffs. I hope you enjoyed well. Thanks for reading 🌷
Btw, i got ghost readers 😂..lol..but i love you all...ghost readers are also my favourite 😤.