Hozuki's Shadow--Hozuki x reader (Hoozuki no Reitetsu)

Chapter 1

"What are you looking at me like that for, demon bastard?"

"I was just wondering how it's possible for such a pathetic divine beast to exist. If you were human, you would already be in Hell!"

"Augh! You! You're the one who should go to Hell!"

"Too late! I'm already in Hell!"

(F/N) exchanged a glance with Momotaro, watching as the man's will to live slowly left his body. Hozuki had come to visit Hakutaku's workplace on business, and as usual, he and the divine beast had gotten into a fight, leaving poor, long-suffering Momotaro to fill his order. (F/N) had accompanied him hoping to keep him in line, but that had gone as well as could be expected, and she currently sat in a corner with her knees curled up to her chest, staying as far away from what was about to become a fist-fight as possible.

'I'm already in Hell', huh?

As she watched the men glare at each other, teeth bared, an interesting thought popped into her head.

"Oh!"

The men stopped, heads snapping back to stare at her, and she decided to take the opportunity to get closer. Sauntering over, she took a seat on one of the stools by the counter, a grin on her face.

"(F/N)-chan," Hakutaku said, "you look happy. Did something happen?"

(F/N)'s grin grew larger.

"I just thought of something," she said, leaning closer, "and I think you'll find it really cool!"

"What is it?" Hozuki asked, setting down his club, which he was about to use to hit Hakutaku over the head. (F/N) shot him a glare, then returned to the conversation, entirely undisturbed.

"So you guys have heard of the seven deadly sins, right?"

"That's right," Hozuki replied. "According to European Hell, they're the seven vices that spur people towards sin."

Hakutaku nodded, taking a seat with his arm conspicuously close to (F/N). "I've heard of it. It's a show with famously bad animation."

"Why is that the first thing you think of?" Hozuki muttered.

"Technically, both answers are correct," (F/N) continued, shrugging her shoulders. "Anyway, there's lust, gluttony, greed, wrath, sloth, pride, and envy. It's significant in European Hell, but when you think about it, it sort of works for Japanese Hell, too. I mean, think about it," she turned to Hozuki, "most of the sins we judge in Japanese Hell fall into one of these categories."

He thought for a moment, and nodded. "Yes, I suppose you're right..."

"And that got me thinking..." She pointed a finger at Hakutaku. "Hozuki-kun is right, you do deserve to go to Hell. You're lust! However..." She moved her finger to point at Hozuki. "You are wrath!"

Hakutaku choked on his laughter. Meanwhile, Hozuki grew eerily silent, and (F/N) thought she heard Momotaro drop something in the background.

"Um...(F/N)-chan..." he stammered. "I think you should—"

"I mean, think about it!" she continued. "You tortured thousands of innocent Hell minions during the sports festival, you constantly inflict bodily harm on King Enma, and while he is annoying, that would hardly hold up as a defense in one of our courts. You constantly hurt Hakutaku-sama simply because you don't like him, and, to top it all off, you're guilty of illegally inflicting punishment on a group of villagers for crimes they committed years prior to the creation of modern Hell. Not to mention pride! You're proud as heck! Therefore," she took a deep breath. "Hozuki-kun, you are a giant hypocrite! Both of you deserve to go to Hell!"