April 7 2015

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    I did it again. I coped with my emotions the unhealthy way again. It seems normal to me now. I've done it three more times since last Tuesday. Every time I did it, it didn't hurt, and it felt normal. People are starting to notice it. My story is that I slid the wrong way into a base for softball. I don't know why people believe that, but they do and they don't pay attention to it. Either way, they leave it alone. I'll just have to do a better job of hiding it. But it's getting warmer out, it is not the type of weather for long sleeves. I have reasons for they ways  I  am. Granted, they shouldn't be a reason for me to do what I've done. There are no excuses, but I can't stop. I'm not okay, I know that, but  I can't change. What's wrong with me? That  seems to be the million dollar question. I can't stop. I don't know how to stop for good. I have never been able to stop for more than two years.

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