My Hero

The Awakening

"After all, we are primitive creatures with primitive instincts. We lean towards the smashing and destruction of surroundings when heated and angry, and although we don't act upon those impulses most of the time, a small part of us wishes to wreak havoc, to start a fire, to create chaos that is a match to how we feel.."

I was reading aloud before Mrs. Peyton interrupted me, "Charlie, you were supposed to write about your hero, mind explaining?". "The hero is between the lines. The hero is the monster that would come out one day and set your soul free." I responded to Mrs. Peyton before she rolled her eyes and gave a predictable response from a high school teacher who cares little to nothing about her job or her hair for that matter, "Charlie, when I gave the assignment to write about heroes in our lifetime, everyone understood it, why are you the exception to that? Do you have a complex about standing out?"

Everyone in my class laughed at her comment, I turned to look at her and she was relishing the moment so much that I hated it more than the snarky remark about my essay, I wish I could've punched her right then and now, my essay would've come to life. Instead, I thanked everyone for listening and went back to my seat.

The bell rings, school's up and it's time to get home, I'm on my way out of class and I get the usual foot trip from Kate and her crew, but it's fine because I've learnt to always wear kneepads since it has become a recurring thing.
Bullies, they are so insignificant leading such meaningless unfulfilling lives, would anyone actually miss these people? They have made my life so insufferable that I've grown to accept its dread. All because, what? Kate is now becoming a child of divorce and I have to deal with it? I wish I could make it all stop..somehow.. "Hey, Charlie, did you forget something?" Kate yelled as I got back up and was walking away. I turned around, confused at the question, "What, possibly?"
"Your apology? You ruined my brand new sneakers." She yelled back this dumbfounding answer to which I had nothing but detest, though it didn't shock me. I grinded my teeth and held my anger then, but promised myself to get back at her later, her and her cult. "I'm sorry." They chuckled and to my half surprise some of my classmates joined in on the laughter. "I hate everyone here" that was the only thought that pondered through my mind that day till the moment I rested on my pillow to eventually fall asleep.

It's the next morning, I'm standing in front of my class room helping to extinguish a big fire by passing along buckets of water. I don't remember how I got here, I only remember going to bed last night, yet I've dressed and came to school, how could have this happened? I try to hide the confusion on my face as to not draw attention to myself. I blend in with everyone and continue helping.
Our efforts were to no avail, the fire was just too big for our buckets. The fire trucks arrive a little later and at last the fire was put away, it was a little too late however. The accident became the talk of the school and words about there being victims had come out. Names started circulating and among them.. Kate Michaelson, Jade Pinto, Daryl Hughes, and other names that I knew all too well, most of these people made my life hell. I didn't know what to feel. And as I froze in my feelings, I froze in my place to think that I might have had something to do with this, and if I did, why am I not caught? My only salvation was precisely that thought. "If I actually did anything, they would've arrested me."

I continued my day in anxiety and fear as if I had committed a terrible crime, which its admission is constantly at the tip of my tongue, waiting to relieve myself of the burden, or at least tell someone what had happened.

I didn't sleep that day.

It's the next day at school and as I'm walking down its hallways I see a memorial set up at one end. I walk up to it and take a look at the pictures of the students who we've lost.

I look at Kate's picture, she's smiling like everyone else but to me it looks as though she's mocking me, if she could talk through the picture to bully me one last time she would. I look down and stop to think if it was cruel and indecent for me to still resent her and look at her in this light.

I look back up at her.

I smirk and almost chuckle before holding it in. I come to a sudden realization, a moment of clarity. Memories then flooded in like an overflowing river hitting me all at once. I know what happened. I know now that I'm not myself anymore, but the monster in me has taken over,

The hero I've been waiting for.