The Hidden Stories Collection

A Total Wreck

Not for the weak, this is a sad one!

"It was just a little under two weeks ago when it happened. It was a quiet car ride home, the only sound was the furry of emotions bubbling up in my head.

'Jayden, I want you to understand that I'm not angry, I'm only disappointed.' I could easily hear the cause of my dismay breaking the painful silence.

'Well dad, needless to say, I'm angry. No, I'm pissed, I am almost eighteen, and I do not need you breathing down my neck all of the time.' I was nearly screaming at the poor man.

I started to reach for the radio and then I felt the soft smack of my father before he proceeded to say, 'I hope you know this is for your own good, Jayden, I do this because I love you.'

All I could think to say was, 'you know, I really wish I could say the feeling was mutual.' Little did I know how much I would regret saying that," I stopped speaking to catch my shaky breath.

"Are you alright Jayden?" Mr. Simmons, the psychology teacher at our school, proceeded to ask.

"Yeah, I just— just need a break for a moment, thanks for asking Mr. Simons." I then look down at my shaking hands. This talking thing, it was very new to me at the time.

"Please, Jayden, we aren't in class. Please call me Phil."

"Alright, Phil, I think I'm ready," I pause to see his friendly nod. "Well, not a whole ten minuets later we get slammed by an oncoming semi. All I remember was seeing some lights out in front of us, I didn't think much of it, but shortly after dad starts to honk profusely. Moments later we take a sharp right turn and the next thing I know there is this loud crashing sound and we are spiraling out of control. I was instantly knocked out with a passenger side collision to a telephone pole It was as if life was moving in slow motion, it felt like at least ten seconds before I was out, but it was closer to around one or two seconds. It was a real eye-opening experience, I saw my life flash just before my eyes..

I won't lie, I'm pretty happy I got knocked out because there is not much left of the drivers side to the car, I do not want to see what became of my dad. All I know is it was pretty gruesome and I was lucky to get away with my life, let alone just a bad cut on my forehead and a broken arm." I proceed to outline the still stinging stitches on my face followed by a deep sigh.

"You know, the funny thing is just after I told him that I hated him, I turned the radio way up and just before the wreck Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven came on. Looking back at it now, that was pretty ironic. What are the odds, huh?

The next time I opened my eyes was two nights later in a hospital bed. As you could probably guess, I was freaked. I had completely forgotten the wreck at the time due to a hard blow to the head. I had a temporary concussion. I kid you not when I say I was lucky.

My dad was much worse off than I was, actually he was so much worse off that as I was out they were basically using me as a living blood bag. Me and him shared the same blood type of O negative, the blood that gives but won't take.

All I know is hours after I woke up he passed. I remained hopeful before his death, I kept thinking that somehow he would miraculously recover. I even prayed to God, whom of which I do not believe in.

I couldn't let him die when my last words to him were only telling him I hated him. I even missed his fucking funeral. Oh God..." The thought instantly started to make me well up. I was going to cry in a room full of people looking straight at me. The once school king, drug lord, and hard partier was going to break down in front of all of his classmates.

There were lots of people I would have never thought to go to those meetings. A few of my friends even went, I never realized how many people my age were really in pain on the inside.

"Hey Jayden, its not your fault. Dude, there is no way you could have known. Your dad, he knew you love him." I looked over to one of my closer friends who apparently had abusive parents to see him all welled up too.

I took a look around the room to see nearly everyone was welling up, including the teacher.

"God damn, this is why I should just keep my mouth shut, I'm not here for your pity, I'm here because of these scars I'll have on my wrist for the rest of my life."

"Jayden, please calm down. Were not giving you pity, everyone here knows the pain you feel, what you are calling 'pity' is sympathy, a much more real feeling." Mr. Simmons chimed in.

I took a deep breath and continued on with my story, now with tears rolling down my cheeks. "They wouldn't let me out of that damn room because I had a mild concussion . I could not even see him get buried even if I wanted to. I will never truly get any closure. I told him I fucking hated him and missed his funeral. I felt like an ass.

The moment the hospital admitted me home I slipped a knife out of the kitchen when mom wasn't looking and slit my wrists, deep. I had no intention of coming back from that. Luckily, or unlucky depending on how you see it, mom could hear my sobs and came to find the bathroom door locked with blood running out under it.

Dad was a firefighter, captain actually, so he had some very large fire extinguishers at our house. Mom swiftly grabbed one and broke down the door. I don't know where my mind was that night, but I found myself back in the hospital getting some more extensive tests done on my head to ensure that was not because of the accident. The doctors deemed me healthy and sent me home with a set of matching forearm sleeves.

Now I find myself here just days after having my heart and mind ripped from me. I don't think I will ever be the same as I was before. Something inside of me has changed and I do not think there is a cure for it. I may be standing here today, but a rather large piece of my died back in that wreck.

Sure the wreck 'opened my eyes' or maybe it 'made me see how precious life is' but I think that there is no other words that could better describe what really happened. I died there that day, a life is not counted by the body but by the soul that inhabits it. I cannot promise you will see me here next week, hell, don't be surprised if you don't see me at school tomorrow."