The Shadows Of Yesterday

The Shadows Of Yesterday {22}

As night fell, the door to our room opened. I stiffened, dropping my gaze from my comics and staring blankly at my desk.

A hand fell on my shoulder. I winced.

"Come on," Seth said.

I shut my comic and obeyed, getting up. Seth grabbed a jacket before leading me out of the room.

We didn't speak as we left the door and began walking around a path through campus. It was chilly out tonight, but I zipped my jacket up and didn't complain.

Seth had that look on his face that said he was lost in thought. I didn't bother asking him about his day, afraid interrupting his thoughts would make him mad.

We walked for a while. It took me a bit to realize we were headed for the football field on the edge of campus.

When we reached it, Seth climbed up and over the fence surrounding it, helping me up and over it as well. We made our way to the bleachers, climbing up to the top row and spreading ourselves on our backs on them, staring up at the stars dotting the sky.

Seth folded his hands behind his head, his hair brushing against mine. "I wanted it to change. But not all of it. Not us. Not like this."

I swallowed thickly. "There is no 'like this', Seth. You're still my best friend. I'm sorry I made you feel like you were anything less than that."

"I've tried so hard to keep us side-by-side," he said.

"I know. I know that," I said. When we'd first become friends, I'd spent so long fearing he'd abandon me. He'd been so popular in school. But he never had.

"Remember?" he said softly.

"Yea," I said, folding my hands behind my head as well. "We'd hide under them in the day, and claim them at night."

When we were kids, his uncle would sometimes drag us to football games at the local high school to watch his godson play. Seth and I would hide under the bleachers, climbing on the structures there and playing tic-tac-toe in the dirt. Some nights, we'd sneak out and go to the fields, lying on the bleachers to watch the stars and talk about running away together.

"We don't have to hide anymore," Seth said. "No one can stop us if we want to just sit up here. That's the change I wanted for us. Everything has to change eventually. I just wanted it to be good change."

I hated change. I knew it was something you could never stop, but I avoided it when I could.

"Our plan hasn't really changed," I said, because grasping onto the plan we'd made over nights of dreaming out loud together was the closest thing to a future I had. "We graduate next year, we find entry-level jobs, higher if we can, and we get an apartment together. You've already got research groups eyeing you. It hasn't changed, Seth."

"Hasn't it?" he said quietly.

"Oh." My chest tightened. "Did you, uh, want to move in with Brynn?"

"Ah, nah, too serious for me," he said. "She can stop by whenever she wants."

"It's okay to be serious," I said.

"Okay, then," he said. "I'm sorry about yesterday. You shouldn't have touched me. But I didn't mean to hit you like that."

"I know," I said. "It's okay, Seth."

"Sure. Accidents happen." He pointed at the sky, tracing his finger along the stars, making his own constellations. "You going to spend more time with your new friends?"

My stomach knotted. "I don't know. I see Harley in the library a lot."

"I want to meet them," he said.