BoyxBoy Oneshots

~3~

After what the doctor just told us, my heart immediately sank. I couldn't afford to be stuck in that place. I needed to get out. I ignored his hurt face and left. I'm sorry but I couldn't. It hadn't registered in me that I could lose Andre till today. I've always knew his health wasn't okay but I didn't think the matter was this serious. I just needed to take a breather.

How do you react when you find out that the person you love in the whole world is dying. That, that person only has a few days left with you. You must be thinking that you'd spend the remaining days with him right. Well I can't. I'm selfish. I want him next to me always. I want to sleep next to him and wake up next to him. All the plans we made vanished into nothing but smoke moving on.

I know I overreacted by leaving but I couldn't stay there. When the doctor announced, it felt like my whole body would shut down. I felt my breath quicken and body go cold. I couldn't imagine life without Andre. I should probably go back to him.

I hailed a cab and drove to the hospital. Once I arrived, I paid the driver and stood near the entrance of the big hospital. I couldn't do this, I really can't.

"Ivan dear. Thank god you're here. Andre has been asking for you." I knew that voice. It was Martha, Andre's mom. She was a lovely woman and she became my mom when I lost mine.

"Yeah I went outside. Is he still up." She nodded and looked away. I know she was trying to be strong but this was her son. She has a right to be weak and cry for everyone but she chose not to. Instead she got focused on spending her son's last days with him making great memories. Something I didn't have the courage to do.

I got inside and headed for Andre's room. The walls of the hospital looked like they were closing in on me. I was hyperventilating. I reached the room and took a deep breath then held the knob in my hand. I opened the door and there he was. Watching TV while being calm as ever. He didn't even look like a dying person. He had an arm supporting his head and was laughing. Did he really have to leave. I bit my lip to stop the tears and went inside the room.

He turned his head and looked at me. He gave me a small smile before motioning for me to come next to him. I walked up to him and he opened the blankets for me to enter. I gave him a small smile and got in. As soon as I got in he placed his head on my chest and I played with his hair. We sat in silence before he decided to break it.

"Baby I'm tired." And just like that my eyes got glossy. I bit my lip to suppress the sobs that were threatening to come out and continued playing with his hair.

"Just go to sleep, I'll be right here." I really don't want to lose him but I can't cause him anymore pain. He's been holding back for me but now it's time for me to let go for him. I felt him take a deep breath before his eyes closed. I hummed him Memory of the wind by Naul because he loved that song.

"You never forgot how I can't sleep without that song huh." He chuckled and I smiled. He closed his eyes once more with a smile on his face. It's true he really can't sleep without this song being hummed or sang to him. I looked at him and he was so at peace. At least I know he's still alive because the monitor is still showing his heart rate.

BEEEEEEEEEEP

All the tears that I was holding back fell on their own. He's really gone. I picked up his head and gave him a kiss.

Until next time my love

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