A Bit of Everything

Harry Potter: Christmas Prank

It was a cold miserable day outside and it had been for the better part of December. To say Sirius Black was bored would be an understatement. The Marauders were in the dormitory they had shared for the past four years. Remus was reading, sprawled across his bed while James and Peter played the twelfth game of Wizards chess for that morning. Sirius was flipping through one of James' Quidditch magazines after being told by Remus to buzz off.

Sirius though had had it, throwing the magazine aside he'd addressed the other three Marauders present, "Want to see what kind of trouble we can get into?"

"Oh Merlin, we're going to die aren't we," Remus said not looking up from his book. James however had forgotten the chess game and was now looking at Sirius with undisguised glee. Peter looked too though he'd turned the same shade as Nearly Headless Nick.

"It's Tuesday," Sirius told Remus with mock hurt, "I know how to restrain myself."

Remus let out a small laugh, "You absolutely do not." But he put his book down all the same and waited expectantly for Sirius to continue.

Now with all the attention on him, Sirius dramatically leapt off the bed and stood in front of his friends, basting momentarily in the attention. "We'll pull off the best prank ever. We'll pull a prank on Dumbles!"

Peter looked like he was going to faint, "on the head- on the headmaster!"

"We'll use the bag of pranks that Prongs got last Thursday for Christmas from his father."

"And you said you knew how to control yourself," Remus muttered picking up his book again.

"You'll get us expelled or killed," Peter squirmed, knocking over the chess board to the pieces' objections.

"Grow a spine Wormtail," James said punching the boy in a friendly manner on the shoulder.

"Come on, Moony," Sirius wined, "who else is going to keep us out of trouble?"

"Nope, absolutely not," Remus said pushing Sirius away. "I will not condone this sort of behaviour."

"Fine," Sirius said, pouting. "You'll miss out on school-wide fame though."

"I'll sit this one out too, lads," Peter told them, making to reset the chess board.

"Come on Pete, we need you," James said. "We need a rat for this job."

"Really?" Peter said uncertainly.

"When have we ever lied to or manipulated you or placed you in danger?" Sirius said, then seeing Peter's thoughtful expression added, "Actually don't answer that."

By lunchtime James and Sirius had their plan all laid out. With helpful suggestions from Remus regarding what spells would end up undoing each other, they were ready to enact plan Rainbledore. Now all that was left was to lay out their trap. Peter was currently distracting Miss Norris while James and Sirius snuck down to bribe the house elves into giving Dumbledore the carefully charmed cutlery, they had spent all morning perfecting. Remus was adamant about not getting involved, so much so that he'd charmed his bed curtains to attack James and Sirius when they'd attempted to drag him off the bed.

They were just leaving the kitchens when the rat at their feet transformed into Peter.

"Filch!" Peter wheezed, his face red with exhaustion.

James turned on Sirius, realising he'd forgotten the invisibility coat, "What's our escape plan?"

"Our what?" Sirius asked.

"Oh Merlin, we're going to die!" Peter exclaimed as the three boys heard Filch's voice approaching from around the corner.

"Mr Filch?" came the sound of their salvation (as Sirius would later call it). "There are three third-year boys tracking mud through the great hall" Remus continued.

Remus came around the corner as Filch's footsteps disappeared. He assessed his three friends with a knowing look. "Did either of you give any thought as to how you were going to escape Filch?"

The silence was his only answer as the four boys made their way back to the dormitory.

That night at dinner those who were staying for the Christmas break watched with varying levels of amusement as Dumbledore's beard changed colour every time he took a bite of food. Dumbledore's eyes twitched with amusement but that didn't stop McGonagall from giving James, Sirius and Peter detention. Remus himself only just avoided the night of detention.