Walking Beside You (World War II Romance)

Arrival

Arrival

I had no idea how long I had slept on the deck. The sun was shining above from the sky when I opened my eyes.

 “We need to get out of here!” I heard the captain talk to his crew. The ship had picked up its speed. There were life boats passing our ship, exhausted survivors were paddling for their lives; I felt awful that we couldn’t stop to help them. I watched them disappearing at the far end of the ocean. I said my silent prayer that they could touch the shore as soon as possible. White-headed waves could still be found everywhere on the sea surface, instead of living human, they were bodies, bodies of someone’s father, son, husband or brother. Apart from sorrow, there was heaviness; heaviness that crashed my lungs, it was hard to breathe, it was hurt to breathe.

 “Jesus Christ! Our engine is going to be stuck.” A seaman yelled when a burnt human remain was floating closer to the back of the ship.

 “Excuse me, sir! What did you just say?” My face was flushed by anger instantly. It had been tragic that someone lost his life already; and now, now that guy only concerned about whether the engine was okay!

 “……” The seaman walked away in silence. I kept glaring at him.

 “You can’t blame him, Al.” I realized Jonathan sitting behind me by the fences. I couldn’t tell whether he was just up there or he had been watching me sleeping for a while.

 “What? How would you feel if you were the dead man, huh?” I tried my best to hold back my emotion, “Don’t you want to be respected when you pass away?”

 “Yes, but under this situation, I would forgive him.” Jonathan stood up, “Both you and I were clear about the risk of being slowed down and falling back from the convoy. You CANNOT blame him.”

 “But…doesn’t he have to say it loud from his mouth facing directly to the body! DIRECTLY to the body of somebody’s love one.”

 “I am sorry, he doesn’t feel comfortable also.” Another seaman apologized for his colleague.

 “That’s okay, Terry.” Jonathan replied the seaman. We had been staring at each other for some moments. Clearly, he was not happy with what I said and I did not accept his defend for the seaman.

 “Al, you can’t be too emotional at the battle field.” He dropped his last sentence and left me alone.

 My gaze returned to the ocean, the sea breeze smelt of sadness. Tears flooded my eyes uncontrollably. I had never felt so hurt before. I hadn’t counted how long I had been weeping. It was twilight when I could finally calm down. I returned to my room, Twinson, Carl, and Sidney were talking about their lives at home. When I pushed opened the door, they stopped. They neither laughed at me nor asked me what was going on but patted on my shoulder.

 “Thank you, guys.” That was all I can say.

 What happened last night was only the first wave of attack, the second wave was more "fantastic". The most terrifying and helpless moment was being next to a destroyer from British Royal Navy. You felt the earth under your feet was going to crumble when depth charges were kept firing from the destroyer right beside us. We could neither sleep on our bed nor stand up and walk on the deck. We could only lay and pressed ourselves against the floor tightly; needless to say running away when our ship was shelled.

Time passed, we learnt from being shocked to panic, from being panic to nothing. We had to get used to shutting off our feelings and sympathy for some circumstance. Being attacked, seeing dead people and by-passing people in need were just part of our daily life, they were no difference from getting up and brushing our teeth every morning. Was it an asset for me? I was not sure.

 It took us 28 days in total to cross the Atlantic. We arrived at Liverpool on 10th November. The weather was typical British-gloomy and cloudy. There were some girls welcomed us at the pier.

 “Hi! John!” Jonathan was approached by 3 Canadian soldiers; one of them was sitting on a bicycle.

 “Good to see you again.” The other broad-shoulder guy with a blonde skin-head hairstyle said. Jonathan didn’t introduce us to his friends. Sidney and Carl reported to the military office first, Twinson and I followed after telegraphing our families at the nearby post office.

 Reaching the machine, my eyes filled. So many things I wanted to say.

 What kind of changes could be brought in 28days? In my prospective, it used to be a change in fashion, gossiping topic, dessert recipes so did relationship status. At this moment, I realized lots of things in my life should not be taken for granted. Like some of the senior soldiers once said a day in battle field transformed a boy to a man. I wasn’t the same girl who left CapeIsland four weeks ago. Finally, I wrote a few lines to Stephanie.

10 November, 1942

Dear Stephanie,

I’ve just landed on Liverpool. I missed you and the girls so much……A lot of things happened on the sea. Thanks god, I am still breathing. Take care. I get to go now.

Yours,

Alice