Hopeless

Chapter One

   "Where have you been?" Tony asked when I walked through the door. I shut the door slowly behind me and looked down at the ground, choosing not to reply. "Answer me!" He shouted, coming towards me. He turned me around and pushed me back into the door, making the handle dig into my lower back painfully.  

   "I was out," I answered quietly, my voice shaking. "With some of my friends." 

   "Friends? What friends?" He sniggered. "Anyway, I don't remember you asking me to go out," He hissed, bringing his face closer to mine, making the smell of alcohol wash over my face. His nails dug into my upper arms while his voice quietened, becoming more threatening. "Do you?" 

   "N-no..." He pulled me forward and then thrust me back against the door.  

   "Then why did you go?" I stayed quiet, not wanting to reply. "Rosanna," The warning tone in his voice made me gulp. 

   "I wanted to be normal," I winced at how pathetic the excuse sounded. "To have some company..." His voice softened now and instead of his nails digging into my arms, he gently stroked them.  

   "You have company," He leaned forward and bent down slightly so he was at my level. "You have me." His mood swings travelled from one extreme to the other.

   His eyes flickered downwards for a second, to my lips, before he brushed his against mine. It was the tiniest, simplest of pecks. 

   "Honey," My mother came down the stairs. Her eyes widened when she noticed me, then narrowed. "What are you doing here?" 

   "Don't be so rude to your own daughter, Michelle." She then noticed Tony - his hands on my hips, how close he was. She probably noticed the redness in my cheeks as well, leaving little to the imagination.  

   "What's going on?"  

   "We're having a conversation." Michelle - I gave up calling her my mother long ago, to her request - kept her eyes narrowed. It wasn't surprising due to Tony's proximity and the way he hadn't turned to look at her whatsoever.  

   "Have you hit her?" She asked with a light smile on her lips. 

   "No." Her smile fell. 

  "Can I?"  

   "No," Tony turned then, taking his hands away from me and storming towards her. "If you ever touch her again, I'm wiping you clean. You'll never get a touch of your precious drugs ever again, okay, Michelle?"  

   Yes, my mother was a drug addict. Not only that, she also dealt drugs. Tony was the leader of a well-known and feared gang, making him a man to be feared. It was strange to think but life was worse before Tony came - Michelle would get drunk or high every night and beat me until I could no longer walk. When Tony came to live there, as Michelle's boyfriend, he made her stop beating me and forced her to cut down on taking drugs. However, on the downside, he also encouraged her to continue dealing even more.  

   "Yes, Tony," She pulled her Blackberry out of her pocket and looked at the screen a minute before typing quickly. "I have a job tonight." Not only was my mother a drug dealer but she also worked as a stripper at Frenzo's; a club owned by one of Tony's gang members. 

   "How much?" He asked, picking up a file on the table and looking it over.  

   "Ross estimated about seven hundred," I moved from the door and began walking up the stairs slowly, my legs sore from the hard workout I had done at the gym. Yes, I didn’t spend my time out with friends – I was practising martial arts, kickboxing and running with my personal instructor