A Story Of A Teenage Girls Makeup Addiction

Story of my life.

Why I Don't Want Girls to Wear Making Up

I do not want anyone I know to where make up because make up is not a part of being free.

         When I was younger my mom used to force me to stay in the house because she said i was always with the boys at the park. At the age of eight I had opened my very first Facebook page. But why you ask? All my friends were doing it so why shouldn't I? Back then my self-esteem and confidence was low due to my family always putting me down. This lefted me with nowhere to turn but into negativity because no one around me was positive toward me set up my Facebook and began uploading pictures hoping to get the attention I wanted. it never came. It felt like I wasn't good enough. As I grew up I was outside less and less and became more depressed. I felt like if I wasn't good enough for people on my Facebook to like me I'd never be good enough for anyone else in the world.

           As I grew up I use to watch my aunty put loads and loads of Mac and Sephora brand make up on her face. Before she looked like a younger and more hip version of Whippy Goldberg. After she would take hours and hours to cake up her face with expensive designers she would look like someone I didn't know. Her and her husband had been together for so long that she would feel old and out of place. She wanted to be who she used to be when they first met. Without the wrinkles and the baby fat. When it comes to wearing makeup it's about finding out who you are and inhasing your beauty. But unfortunately, the effect of having it on is that you lose yourself before you can really find out who you are inside.

          I remember hating myself in freshman year which is known to be the hardest year of your teenage life. I was as big as a pig. My skin was tanning before I was even old enough to know what boys were which caused parts of my skin to end up unevenly colored. My hair wouldn't fit into a ponytail and back then those where important to have in a high school where popularity meant so much. I was always put down by everyone I hated myself for being created, I hated people for being able to see me every day and most of all I hate being able to see myself every day. I'd hate watching other girls with their boyfriends and other people getting compliments and attention off there looks and different colors of beauty and I was destined to be I like that.

      I slowly watched and caught onto the makeup dolls applying on load of foundation and eyeliners and mac lipstick. I watched them transform into someone I didn't even know afterwards. if it was that easy for them then it would be much easier for me and pretty soon I was one of them too. I woke up excited to try my new dollar tree makeup which fit my face so perfectly. I walked into school feeling brand new outside but totally lost within myself inside. It felt so good when I had people looking at me telling me how pretty I really was and how much of a fashion model I should be for my pictures that had made their way to Facebook. I was always complimented on my beauty outside. But I'm inside was completely dead. One night coming home I looked at my mom a thirty-five year old woman who looks just like her fifteen old daughter. I had way more make up on then her. I hurried toward the bathroom fast walking in, locking the door and began washing all the makeup off my face until my face was filled with nothing but me.

''Who are you?'' she observed her curves looking deeply into the mirror searching for an answer.

''I am me. My looks may not be like yours and people not understand where we come from."  She cracked a smile which lit up the bright bathroom.

 ''I am you, and you are me!" she said proudly to herself. I looked myself in the mirror once more. And for once in my life I was looking at God's creation for what it was. Myself.

I looked around the empty bathroom that held nothing but a toilet a sink and a bathtub and small echoes of chirping in and out I noticed how empty the room was I seen myself for the first time I felt like that bathroom. Empty. All this time I had let something as simple as a brand of makeup take my life away. I watched as my cousins would wish they were like me. I never wanted them to be. My family struggled with self-esteem and depression and I never wanted them to be like me or do what I did because most of the time I didn't even enjoys what I was doing. In fact, putting that make up on everyday was a time consumer. But since everyone loved it. I had no choice. I wanted my cousins to be different. With a mind and a heart of their own. Something I hadn't had. I once heard that the eyes are a gateway to the soul. I wanted people to see them for them. And not what they hid behind.

Makeup has changed the way many people see each other today. There is one main source to blame for this? Social media.

  Social media has giving males and females an image that we have to be a certain shape, color, or age to be accepted. I watched as all the beautiful celebrities would impress the fan off looks alone and that I seen and wanted to be. Perfect like them, in everyone else's eye. Even when you are feeling like you're not good enough for anyone's needs. You meet yours and go over and above them and if you're not perfect to someone else. Be perfect to yourself first. Because truly we are all social media's image.

I remember a couple years ago I had gone to the Regel's cinema to watch a new movie that had come out. I walked into the theater. It was the size of the Orpheum Theater I walked towards the ticket booth it was an older man that approached me back saying simply

''Hello, How may I help you tonight? '' he pronounced. His voice was the sound of a old burnt out motor. I looked up at the movie selections and there were a lot to choose from. My eyes stopped scanning when I seen the sign ''The Help'' in bold black letters. I had picked my chose and paid for my ticket. And pretty soon I was relaxing in a movie theater chair.

I watched as Abilene (Viola Davis) acted so tremendously. She reminded me of me. She had lost so much but yet remained so strong threw it all. One part caught me. Scene played in over and over.

"You are kind, you are smart, you are important," I observed as the beautiful black lady recited echoing through the dark movie theater.

I wondered what it would be like to trade places with her. Then, I pictured what would slavery be like but am I wrong for that? Back in the olden times slavery was what taught people to love one another and what was also the major starter for folk songs and other music today. It taught many people that through hard times to keep pushing because they knew things were going to get better. As Tupac Shakur put it, ''After every dark night, there's a brighter day."

        In this generation we have been taught everything but how to love each other. It goes even deeper than that. It starts with loving yourself. But how can you love someone when you can't even love yourself? It's impossible. Because to see the beauty of someone else you would have to see the beauty that's inside of you. This is not easily seen. Many people go looking for it threw money, drugs, sex.makeup but out off all of these which one can last forever? None.

So my message to anyone and everyone who reads this. Make up is something that takes away from natural beauty. When you see me I will never be without my make up because I feel as if I look weird without it. Make up is another form of drugs. Once you use it for that first time? You have lost yourself forever.