Random Male Reader Oneshots

memes with male reader

Random things idk

Steve: M/n is going through a phase

Steve: At least, oh we hope it's a phase

Eddie: He bolts every chance he gets

*m/n running out of Eddies place*

Steve + Eddie: M/N!

Steve: M/N M/N!

*they run after m/n*

Eddie: So we had no choice but to put him on a child safety tether

Steve: it's a leash

Steve: and we did have a choice

*m/n sitting mentally crying*

M/n: BIRDS WOULD TAKE OVER

Dustin: M/n you can say the same thing about-

M/n: DUSTIN THEY CAN FLY

*everyone looks at m/n confused*

M/n: one strong bird, comes down GRABS YOU goes into the air.

*Eddie was laughing his ass off while the others questioned if you are high*

M/n: WHAT. ARE YOU. GOING. TO. DO WHEN THE BIRD LET'S. GO

Eddie: *still giggling* m/n-

M/n: what are you doing? You gonna fly too, are you gonna fly to safety, are you gonna land on a soft mat?

M/n: YOUR SMACKING INTO THE FUCKING CONCRETE, YOUR DEAD

*m/n then sits down calmly and grabs his apple juice and three bags of fruit snacks while the others look at him confused Eddie dead on the floor from laughter*

*m/n walks into a room where Dustin is talking to Will and Eddie about d&d"

M/n: Dustin why did you tell me your dad have all that ass *talking about Steve*

*Dustin looks at him eyes wide open the two others starring with pure confusion*

M/n: Naw hear me out fr tho-

*m/n walks into Mike house everyone in the living room and point to Dustin*

M/n: Approximately three times a week I have unprotected sex you yo mother and fatherr~

*Everyone turns to Steve and Eddie while Dustin has his mouth wide open eyes having tears*

Mike: this is why I kicked you out last time

*Billy, Steve, Eddie, Robin, Mike, El, Will, Max, and Lucas in the car M/n driving*

Robin: OMG how do you drive so well

M/n: because there is illegal shit in here

*everyone looks at m/n who's smiling still driving like what he said is normal*

M/n: hehehe because if I don't use my turn signal we are all doing 15 because I'm going to lie and say it's Eddies

*m/n turns to them at a stop light*

M/n: put your seatbelts on, sweetheart.

*m/n starts driving again*

M/n: you are not safe

*it's safe to say nobody went into m/n's car again*

*m/n brought a speaker to school and was setting it up to play music*

Eddie: m/n what are you-

*Cpr started to play and m/n started singing along*

M/n: BUT I CANT FUCK UP MY NAILS, SO I'MMA PIC IT UP WITH CHOP STICKS