Blind

Chapter 2

I was being released from the hospital today. Nurse Stahl, or at least, someone, was going to check up on me every day. I was going to be taken back to my apartment, and she was going to stay with me for a few weeks, just so I could get settled back into my usual way of life again. The car ride to my apartment was uneventful. I might have passed the time by looking out the window, but there was no chance of that happening now. Smiling bitterly to myself, I twiddled my fingers, imagining what they were doing. What the outside might look like. Then my eyes widened, a chill running through my body, and I looked at where the nurse should be. She'd told me to just call her Torie, but I was keep calling her nurse in my head.

"Torie. What am I going to do about my job?"

She was silent for a moment, then said,"What did you do?"

"I was an artist." I painted things, and had them sold for decent amounts of money, and displayed at small galleries. I just sketched portraits as well. But how on earth would I do that without my eyes? I needed to see what I was doing! I heard her sigh in pity. That word again. Pity. It brought a sour taste to my mouth, and I kept from grimacing.

"Well...I don't see how you could continue being an artist. Of course, you weren't an abstract-"

"No." I cut her off, sensing she was probably thinking along the wrong lines. "No. I liked to do hyperrealism paintings. Not abstract." Feeling a sigh brush through my lips, I turned to press my hands against the cold glass, enjoying the feeling of it beneath my hand. The rest of the ride was in silence, but I was too caught up in my own thoughts to notice.

Once we'd arrived, I had to wait for her to get out first, then guide me out. I felt myself flush with embarrassment. Sure, it wasn't so bad in the hospital, but in public? No way was I being lead around like some kid! But, if I wasn't 'handled with care' I'd probably walk in front of a car, and get even more injuries. And that would be just peachy. The nurse lead me steadily, but I still felt like I was going to fall flat on my face any second.

The buildings reception floor didn't have a carpet, so I could just hear her heels clicking on the floor, and my sneakers shuffling along. They'd let me buy some clothes before I left, at least, the nurse had. And I hoped she had an impeccable sense of fashion.

"Just wait a second while I get the elevator." Her hands left me, and I was left standing still, not quite sure where I was, apart from beside the elevator. Shuffling around awkwardly, I felt relief pulse through me when she took my hands again. Leading my forward with soft instruction, I let out the breath I'd been holding, and grabbed onto the railing, leaning my head against the wall. She sighed as well. I heard the elevator 'ding!' as it started to go up the floors. I lived on the fourth floor. Not too far from the ground. Normally, I'd just run up the stairs but...that probably wasn't a smart idea.

My hands reached up to touch the soft material covering my eyes. They said I could just wear sunglasses but...I went with a simple bandanna. It didn't hurt was much sunglasses did. I never liked those. The elevator dinged again when we reached the fourth floor, and I stood up straight, the nurse taking my hand and leading me out.

"Which is yours?"

"The one just next to the one directly in front of the elevator. To the right." I fumbled for my keys, then handed them to her. The door swung open, and I waved away her hands, walking in steadily myself, then immediately bumping against something.

"Goddammit!" I hissed, and Nurse Stahl immediately shut the door and came to help.

"You were being too bold." She chided me, and I flushed, with embarrassment, and anger. "Now. It's almost evening, so I'll make you some dinner, get you to bed, then I'll leave you be. I'll come back at 8 tomorrow, so it doesn't matter if you aren't up, alright?"

I nodded, and reached out. I could visualise the house the house in front of me, I knew every inch of it yet...I took the first step, and immediately my hands swung down, searching all around me for something, anything that I might trip over. I breathed out shakily, and I kept walking gingerly, each step slow, and careful. I finally reached what I thought to be the living room, and found the chair. Walking around it, I fell back, grunting in relief at the fact I didn't have to walk for a little while.

"Dinners ready!" I shook my head groggily, and tried to rub my eyes, then realised I shouldn't. Stopping midway, I brought them back down to help push me up from the chair. I stood shakily, and turned, taking a couple of steps towards the kitchen. I was hesitant, and felt my heart beating faster with each step, unsure whether I would fall or not. I made it to the table, and reached around me for a chair, then sat in it heavily.

The nurse came and put something delicious smelling on the table in front of me. I was about to ask for the cutlery, when she said softly."Open up." There was nothing playful about that statement, and I felt disgust for myself run through me. I had to be fed? Opening my mouth obediently, I felt her place something warm in my mouth. I chewed, then swallowed, opening my mouth for more. Bit by bit, I finished the meal.

She then stood, and took the plate."I'll just clean up, then I'll take you to your room. Alright?" She was anxious about me. About how I'd deal with all this.

"Okay. Then you're coming back at 8 tomorrow, right?"

A pause, then,"Oh! Oh yes. It'll probably be me tomorrow. Then after that, I can't say."

Pushing my chair back carefully, I stood. Torie immediately taking my hand. I felt irritation at being treated like a child flow through me. But I knew if I let go, I'd probably crash into something.

Letting her lead me to my room, I stumbled along blindly, hands going out instinctively now. She placed them on the bed, and I sat heavily, my head falling into my hands. I heard her exit the room, closing the door quietly behind her.

It still bothered me, how I could feel my hands on my face, or feel the soft carpet under my feet, yet I was unable to see any of it. Sighing, I leaned back, and thought about the layout of my room. Well, if I was sitting on the left side of the bed, which I assumed was correct, then...the wardrobe should be in front of me.

Standing, I walked forward, holding my hands in front of me. I let out a dry laugh as I imagined what I must look like. A zombie, probably. My hands landed on the smooth wood, and I sighed in relief. Lowering my hands, I scrambled about for a minute, before locating the small doorknob. Pulling it, I stepped back, If I remembered correctly...furrowing my brow, I reached out again, my hands coming into contact with soft fabric. Searching around where my fingers came into contact with the material, I struggled to find where everything was. Shirts. Pants. Drawer...Drawer for boxers! Opening it, I chose a pair, and got changed, taking my shirt off easily. The cool air hit my back, and I shivered, goosebumps spreading over my skin. Changing quickly, I made my way back to the bed, stumbling slightly when I tripped over the end of the bed. Wincing in pain, I cursed silently, rubbing my aching shin.

Flopping back onto the bed, I let out a breath, then turned onto my side, burying my face in my pillow. It wasn't fair! It just wasn't fair. A choked sob pushed it's way out of my mouth, and it was followed by another, and another, until I was clutching at the sheets and sobbing. Yet still, no tears flowed down my face. My cheeks remained dry, but I rubbed at them instinctively.

"It's not fair..." I repeated this like a mantra between sobs. Why was it me? I was an artist. I'd just had my lucky break. I could have been successful. I could have been rich. I could have been famous. But I wouldn't ever draw again. Not ever. All because of a stupid crash that I couldn't even remember. That was how I fell asleep. Huddled in my blankets, a pang in my chest that I couldn't stop, and my face pressed into the soft pillow.

AN: Wattpad format paragraph thing freaks me out. Just being copy and pasted doesn't work! Please tell me about any mistakes! Vote and comment!