forever my always

Chapter 4- sofia

                       ❀

 It's been a few hours since Noah left, 2 hours since I put my siblings to bed 2 weeks since my parents have been back and 10 years since everything in my life changed. Tonight, is my first day when I havent been busy or needed to catch up with school I never get a night to myself to relax and spend some time on myself I don't know myself that well at all it seems like everyone else in my life is more important than me I decide that im going to get ready for bed and to read the books Noah bought me today that I still feel guilty about me taking and relax in my bed. I go over to my vanity and spread my hair over my shoulders I have always been confident in my looks the one thing in my life that I could stand I stared at myself in the mirror now my eyes looked drained I was tired anyone could see it my hair had become less vibrant throughout the years it was still long the way that I liked it like it was a shield that could protect me from anyone I brushed through it delicately brushing the knots out from the bun I shoved in my hair everyday for work. BANG. The door shot open. I knew it wasn't noah he wouldve knocked or come through the window he wouldn't want to wake eloise and oscar up and I don't know anyone else that would come banging on the door at 10 pm at night. I can hear the load barking of a voice I knew all to well and I knew my parents were back. I would be lying if I wasn't terrified I didn't expect them to be back tonight its too early for them to turn up out of nowhere again my heart was beating 100 miles per hour and I knew I needed to get to my siblings but as I put my hairbrush down , my parents came into my room their eyes flashed outraged looking back and forth from me to my hairbrush my dad came over to me, the little girl inside of me expected him to hug me but he could never change instead he came over to me he put his hand against my mouth muffled my tears and my protests me begging him to leave me alone he pushed me against the wall the cries of his own child didn't affect him anymore

"we were banging on the door its freezing outside and dark and you had the audacity to ignore us and brush your pretty little hair" he mocked in an insincere tone

" I wasn't brushing my hair I was doing homework" I lied whatever was coming next wouldn't be good

" you've never been a good liar sofia I think your forgeting who you are talking too" he said the anger rising in his voice

He looked around the room, my room, filled with photos of memories that they were never there for, I tried to fill my room with colour and fairy lights for my room to be my safe space but now my room was the last place I wanted to be I wanted to be far away and to keep running and to never return. He seized the scissors from my bedside and began to chop my hair to my shoulders my long hair now on the floor. my Sheild destroyed.

His weapon of destruction his own power against mine.

He let go as I dropped to the floor now muffling my own cries of defeat, my mother looked back she nearly appeared to be sympathetic but when she grabbed my father's arm and walked out the door hand in hand , I knew she would never choose me she would always choose him her own daughter would never be her first choice.

I could never imagine that the person who could hurt you the most were the people that brought you to earth that made you who you are the people known as your parents. And once they have finished the hurting, they leave you alone, abandoned once again like nothing happened like they didn't just go break your soul. Again. My room was now filled with different memories no longer full of colour light friendship now full of betrayal, hurt and sadness. As soon as my parents walked away from the drive way, I called my siblings to my room called Noah again to come and save me. I'm stronger than this I don't want to be the damsel in distress waiting and calling on someone to save me.