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•Lillia•

Finals were hard. As a matter of fact, they sucked.

So how come I wish they weren't over?

If they weren't over then I would have an exuse not to go back to Jar Island.

Graduation was.... Fun?

Oh, who am I kidding? It sucked too. I mean, it was nice. I got to see the proud looks on my parents faces. I got to give my valedictorian speech. And I got to have the satisfaction of knowing I did it. I graduated college.

But what people don't tell you is that the whole ceremony you also think about the fact that you will never be a college student again. Nothing will ever be the same. No more college parties. No more late night vending machine raids. No more dorm life. You have to get a job. Start your life. For real.

My parents are lending me money, so I can share a loft with Kat in Brooklyn. I got an internship at an architectural firm. I have a safety net, a plan, but that didn't make me dread graduation any less. I can't live off my parents forever. As easy as it is I have to make it on my own. I don't want to be thought of as Princess Lillia forever.

All my stuff is in boxes. Almost all my friends are already gone. I'm leaving for Jar Island tomorrow morning and am having my stuff shipped to my apartment.

My mom told my dad hurt his back and he needs help around the house. The fact that my mom and Nadia need my help taking care of him scared the ever loving shit out of me. I got the earliest flight to the mainland.

I'm just hoping that it isn't as bad as I think and they just want me to come back home. I haven't been back since Freshman year.

I just couldn't do it. Once Kat's dad died and she moved. I haven't had much of a reason to. Alex has also been begging me to go with him, but it's just too hard.

I saw Reeve at Mr. DeBrassio's funeral. We talked at the reception, but it was too awkward. At the time I still loved him. Those feelings don't just stop. Nadia keeps telling me that he still loves me. Apparently he hasn't had a serious relationship since we broke up. He injured his knee and moved back home, so now he works for his dad.

I've had boyfriends in the past but none of them have ever gotten as far as saying I love you. Alex is still my best friend. He's had a few relationships, but nothing serious either. He still jokes that I ruined him for anyone else, but it's not like that with us. We've both been focusing on school.

~the next morning~

I've been calling my mom and Nadia non-stop, but they haven't answered.

I tried calling them on the ferry but at a certain point their phones went to an automatic voicemail.

I was dreading going through town.

The island doesn't exactly have many taxi's or rental cars available. Especially at such short notice. But lucky for me, guess what they do have? Rental bikes! YAY! So not only do I not want to be here for many reasons, but now I have to leave my luggage at the docks in a locker to pick it up later. And to top it all off the only available bike route is right past Reeve's place and numerous construction places he works at.

Riding my bike past school and Rennie's old place made me realize I actually did miss this place. I don't totally hate being back here. However, I am not wearing the correct attire. I'm wearing a cream long sleeve turtleneck and a beige-ish schoolgirl skirt with knee high black boots. Not exactly great for exercise. Especially biking. Luckily it's not very hot on Jar Island.