an unexpressed love

BELIEVE IN FIRST SIGHT LOVE

I was studying my higher grade.i guess he too. i noticed him but i dont like him at all.on a fine gloomy morning ,it was not too hot .my mother asked me to pluck the flowers.i was wearing a black skirt and a multi colour t-shirt.i climbed wall to pluck flowers.side by i was watching him playing with a small girl.He was wearing a green t-shirt and a black shorts.he is not too short and not too tall.his eyes was black and small .his nose was sharp with a shining at tips and lips ,omg what an expression he gave with his lips.he wantedly losing the game for the sake of that little girl.he was enjoying the little girl's smile.when that small girl was throwing the ball ,it just hit onto his head and bounced.the expression he gave ,I couldnt control my laughter.he heard my voice and looked at me with a smile.then i just went inside by controlling my laugh.was busy in exams.i got saltry inside my house.so to get a fresh air i went to my open floor.BREEZING.KITES FLYING ALL OVER ThE SKY.i just saw him studying but i didnt have a clear stare.that time it was cloudy, a flight passed that way.we both had a look at the plane.then i started studying........i felt like watching him
When i looked at him, i drowned into his eyes.i couldnt take my eyes at all.THat was the moment i believe in first sight love.
I started noticing him.even though he was my opposite house.i didnt know anything about him.i have an elder sister and one younger brother.oneday we all talked something about our neighbours. that time i came know that he was my long relation cousin. My mother said that "BUT WE DONT TALK WITH EACH OTHER".i eagerly asked "WHY MOM!!!!".she just ignored my question and went inside.next day i went to school, there one of my friend talked with a boy.i asked, who is he?.she said "he was my old friend".i said "ohh".she revealed that his friend was ur opposite house boy.suddenly Without thinking i asked "WHICH SCHOOL IS HE STUDYING "then she told "st.john school".these incidents surprised me,because i didnt take any steps but i got info about him.
A few days later,when i heared his bike sound, i forgot myself and watched him from my window.my inner heart asked me "R u in love?".i replied myself ' I dont know. ......and asked myself "Is this what love is".

                     Then i cant hide me from him.i started to live in my own world.(world of me and him).I tried to notice his each and every move and attitute.,because i wanted to understand him completely. His beauty got my attention,but his personality stole my heart.next day i was waiting for him at the same place.but he went with his friends.I got anger.u know I am a short temper person.this incident pulled out my heart.next day i ordered my mind "not to go".but my legs followed the path of my heart.i was thankfull to architect who build his and my house,because i can see him anywhere from my house.He was watching Television and i was watching him.His eye ball rolled to the corner of his eyes to see me whether i was seeing him.then i nodded my head down. I pretended like studying.then he lied on his bed and playing with his pillow by throwing and catching.suddenly his mother interfered the scene.so i just went inside.this started as a as usual thing.
Sometimes he feel that no one sees him but i do.he is the one i always wanted to protect.but i can only watch him from afar.
My heart bursting with feelings and emotions.My mind bursting with words to say I LOVE U .but my soul disturbed my fear.
         I love him but i cant find the courage to say to him.i need him but i cant find strength to hold onto him.
"This isnt love",i lied to myself. "He doesnt love me",i consoled myself.eventhough i can see him alone,i couldnt go near to him.
              The sound of silence is irritating.my mouth shut and eyes with tears.i cant tell, i cant speak.THUS MY LOVE LEFT UNEXPRESSED.