somewhere only we know

do i think about the one that got away?

"It was about Vietnam."

She barely heard the words, but she caught enough of his quiet sentence to garner a response. Joyce instantly knew he was ready to talk through the nightmare that woke him from his sleep the previous week. In response, she turned a bit to find his own blue eyes meeting hers from his place on the couch. She could just see the pain written on Hopper's face, and she mustered a kind, small smile and an understanding nod. He was wearing a pair of tired and worn, dark-wash jeans and a long-sleeve thermal that was juniper green... and also very, snug.

The rain was pouring down hard in Hawkins, beating against the roof of the cabin, and it was like music to her ears. Whenever it stormed in the town, the growing threat of the other dimension seemed to still, making these days the most peaceful...

if only it would actually fucking last.

Then, she set down the plate she was washing, and the sponge, in the sink so that she could grab a towel to dry off her hands. She pulled down the sleeves of her burgundy and navy flannel before Joyce turned back and walked over to her boyfriend, coming to stand in front of him. He immediately brought his hands up to her jean-clad hips, pulling her close while her hand sank into his hair, the other resting against his bearded cheek.

"Where do you wanna talk?" She asked, her fingers stroking through his hair as she gazed down into Hopper's eyes, and then she noticed him near the brink of tears. The Vietnam nightmares were rough, and they were always the most challenging ones for the both of them to get through. They had only become more frequent since returning home from Russia, and she wished she could've personally killed every one of those bastards that hurt him. She remembered how tight they held each other graduation night, remembered how they thought if they never let go that he would never have to leave. Neither of them had any interest in the celebrations afterwards, because this just meant they were one step closer to losing everything. They had so many plans for their future (as if they had a goddamn clue), and something as simple as the announcement of his name could ruin everything.

Joyce remembered being alone at home, and she was sobbing so hard that she was practically silent when they announced his name. At the time, she had no idea what this meant for the life ahead of them, but she knew it couldn't have been very good. Then, she snapped back to reality before she got sick from thinking about it too much.

Fuck war.

Joyce watched him ponder for a moment before he was moving to stand, guiding her backwards a little, and still hugging her hips with his large hands. Then, he let his hands fall to her thighs in order to lift her up, legs at either side of his hips. She fucking loved it when he picked her up without warning. It was such a casual, yet intimate act for her - a ritual she fell rather in love with. He walked them into the bedroom, sitting with her in his lap so that he was facing the window to watch the droplets of rain.

"Hey..." she rasped, noticing him drifting away in his mind, and she brought her fingers up to hook beneath his chin, now tilting his head back towards her. "What happened in that dream of yours, baby?" Joyce questioned him directly this time, reminding him of what they needed to discuss before it ate him alive from the inside, out. Sometimes, when her lover was ready to be consoled over his bad dreams, he just needed that final push to say what was lingering on his mind.

"Leaving you that day was the fucking hardest thing I've ever had to do, Joyce." He admitted, his voice hardly above a whisper as he stared into her eyes, and promptly, was grappling with making the sentence leave his mouth. His words made her heart shatter, and her lips pursed into a worried frown while she brought both her hands up to hold his face. She remembers all the uncertainty of whether or not he would return home, and it was enough to kill her spirit. "I lost you... you and those brown eyes. We lost decades together that we should've had."