This isn't a poem just a vent I swear to god this world hates me. My best friend left me, I can't lose weight no matter what, I was accused of bodyshaming someone and now most of my year hates me, won't talk to me and refuses to speak to me at all!! Along with that I'm such a bad friend I always make fun, joke and laugh but it always ends up worrying them and I never mean to make them upset or worried and I hate myself for making them feel like that but it keeps happening no matter what I do it keeps happening. I need to pull myself together and stop being such a pussy, just because I've been through a few minor problems throughout my life doesn't mean I'm allowed to break down. I'm supposed to be the happy, strong friend who people can go to when they're upset, not the friend who has panic attacks when they're called on by a teacher in class or who wants to cry everytime they get an answer wrong in class. Im such a fucking crybaby I don't get why I can't be a normal person with normal and appropriate feelings. I hate the fact that I'm the 'emotional' one, I don't deserve to be, so many people have it so much worse than me and I'm over here having a fucking breakdown over a few minor inconveniences, it's fucking pathetic, I'm fucking pathetic why can't I just be fucking normal. I'm an attention seeking, desperate bitch at most, I'm such a waste of space I swear everyone and everything will be so much better when I'm gone, if I ever get the fucking courage, the only things keeping me alive rn is my best friend and my cat, my cat is old and is on her last legs and my best friend will eventually come to see how much of a fucking disappointment I am and leave just like my last. My life isn't going great at the moment, but know that I love you, don't give up, I'm not a fighter, my journey is almost over but yours can go so much further <3
