Macdonald Hall #3: Beware the Fish!

We're looking into it

In her five years as weekend switchboard operator at television station CHUT, Mary Webster had never had such a busy time as on that Sunday evening.

"Everybody wants to know what happened at the end of the Matinee movie," she told her boss, Mr. Tupper. "They're all telling me something about a fish."

"A fish? What are they saying?"

Mary excused herself to answer another call. "CHUT, good evening... Oh, yes, madam. John married Louise, and the murderer turned out to be Pierre... Yes, madam, I know—a fish. We're looking into it. Thank you for calling CHUT." Mary looked up. "You see? There's another one."

Mr. Tupper frowned. "A fish? What about a fish?"

"They say it appeared, sir," said Mary. "Just at the climax of the movie, the screen showed a big fish. Then there was the most diabolical laughter and someone said, 'Attention, world, we bring you the fish.' Then more laughter. That 'attention, world' business really scared some of our viewers."

"Sounds like a broadcast from outer space," laughed Mr. Tupper. "The invasion of the fish people."

"Go ahead and laugh," she grinned. "But I have to answer the phone. What shall I tell people?"

"Make up something about atmospheric conditions, and tell them we're looking into it," said Mr. Tupper. "That's what we're going to do."

* * *

Elmer Drimsdale's alarm went off with an ear-splitting jangle at six o'clock Monday morning, waking up the three boys in 201 and probably half the dormitory as well.

Elmer threw off the covers and bounded energetically out of bed. He inhaled and exhaled deeply, unable to do his customary deep kneebends because of the lack of space.

"The beginning of another day!" he announced brightly. "Time to tend to all my little friends."

A slipper whizzed by his ear. "Your little friends'll be fine. It's your big friends you've got to worry about," growled Bruno from the depths of his pillow.

Boots sneezed five times, signifying that he was awake for the day. Slowly he began to crawl out of bed.

"Would you like to feed my goldfish?" Elmer offered generously.

"No, thanks," said Boots. "Maybe some other time."

"Perhaps you'd like to sprinkle a little sugar for my ant colony?"

"Oh, all right," sighed Boots. He took the sugar dispenser over to the terrarium, removed the cover and switched on the lamp. He sprinkled a little sugar on top of the sand. Instantly several dozen ants broke to the "surface. He sprinkled a little more and more ants emerged. Boots watched, transfixed. "Hey, Bruno," he exclaimed, without taking his eyes from the terrarium, "you should see this. A miniature riot!"

"No, I shouldn't," mumbled Bruno, half asleep.

"Here, you guys," said Boots to the ants. "I'll give you some more."

"No, no," said Elmer quickly. "That's enough for today."

"Yeah," Bruno agreed. "Too much sugar will rot their little teeth."

"You know," said Boots, "that's really neat! I'm going to get me one of these."

"Spare me!" moaned Bruno.

While Boots showered and dressed, Elmer began the long, careful process of watering his plants. Then he too got dressed. Bruno never stirred. Finally, at about 7:15, Boots and Elmer left for the dining hall.

Just as the door clicked behind them, Bruno hopped out of bed and went straight to Elmer's video machine. He switched it on and watched with delight as the salmon materialized on the screen.