Mountain

2.15

right now me and James are in studio A going through our duet until he was supposed to catch me but he let go of my hand and i landed on the floor.

"i'm sorry. my pinkie... slipped." he said.

i got up and rolled my eyes. "just go from the lift."

we tried the airplane lift but as soon as he put me in the air i felt uncomfortable. "James put me down."

"no i'm supposed to turn around."

"no put me down!" i jumped off his hands and pushed him away.

"you have to trust me, Iz. i've lifted you before. i can do that lift." he said.

"trust you? that's funny the last time i trusted you, you went and kissed another girl." he was silent. "let's just go from the beginning."

we did the jumping part. "it's the wrong foot." i said to him.

"no it's not."

"yes it is."

"no it's not."

"yes it is! it's the right foot that goes in front."

i choreographed the dance and he tells me i'm wrong.

"no it's the left."

"no James it's the right foot."

"left foot."

"right foot." i got my voice louder.

"left foot!"

"right foot!" i yelled.

"hey guys," Eldon cut us off, "I don't mean to interrupt you but i need some rehearsal time."

"go for it. we're done." i said.

"what? no! what? you're just gonna leave rehearsal like that?" James argued with me but i kept walking away from him.

"yep!"

"what?"

i just don't want to fight James anymore. and i know that no matter what we do, we're always gonna be fighting. so i just leave.

the next day Kate asked me and James to show her the duet but when we danced it, it was going as always. badly.

the airplane lift went horrific, he dropped me again on the turn.

"okay stop!" Kate yelled at us. "Giselle and Tahlia are going to challenge you for the duet."

"what? they should've competed for that when they had the chance." James said.

"nationals is right around the corner and you guys are far from ready. the challenge will happen this afternoon."

"this afternoon? how did Gisselle and Tahlia put together a duet so fast?" i asked. "were you planning this the whole time?"

"look i have to do what's best for the team. if this is what it comes down to, so be it."

i can't believe Giselle and Tahlia were planning this behind our backs. not only i'm their friend, i'm their dance captain.

"if you guys want to keep the duet, you need to prove it." she said and walked out of the studio.

i want to keep the duet. i don't know if i'll be able to though.

that afternoon when Tahlia and Giselle started dancing all that we did was just fight more. "they're gonna take the duet away, James. you're so distracted." i said.

"there's a lot going on with Eldon and everything."

"that's what you're most worried about?"

our national duet is on the line and so is relationship. and he doesn't even care.

"it doesn't always have to be about us, Izzy."

"it's never about us, James. we haven't talked about this."

"okay you made you're point, thank you. just stop."

"you just want me to stop trying."

"no. i want you to stop talking about this cause i'm losing focus."

"i thought you were gonna fight for me..." i sobbed out.

he looked at me for a second and then looked away.

Thalia and Giselle finished their duet and they came to sit instead of us.

"alright you guys are up." Kate said to us.

i stood up and turned to look at him. "is this even worth fighting for?" i asked him.

he shrugged his shoulders and then shake his head slightly. "no." he said and the tears came out of my eyes on their own.

it's just kind of finalizes how he felt. this whole time he never wanted to fight for me.

"you guys can have the duet. we don't want it anymore. congratulations." i said to the two girls and walked out of the studio.

"Izzy—" Gisele called me but i kept walking.

i got out of the studio and sat on the floor and buried my head in my hands, crying.

i told him not to come talk to me. ever. but i never thought he wouldn't fight for me. i thought — i thought i was important to him.