CONTENT WARNING: Swearing. Implications and descriptions of harassment, suicide, self-harm, slurs, and several unhealthy disorders. Read at your own risk, but know that I will not hide the truth anymore after this statement is out. This is the real reason TSMM the show ended, and the book dub began.
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Hey everyone, let me just preface this by saying this exact statement was issued on my discord a long while ago, so the words may look familiar. I should not have to be obligated to go out of my way for something that happened nine months ago... but if it's what it takes for that guilt to leave me tf alone and never come back into my life then fine.
Let me begin this with a backstory. Disclaimer- this is in no way supposed to be justification for such actions I will speak of in the future. This is also not intended to guilt trip anyone who was deeply affected by what I had done, either. This is all necessary, however. As it will be important to know in the future.
When I was 10, I was transferred out of my nice little private catholic school into a public school for the fifth grade and further. Most kids that have that kind of background (especially in my situation, with my documented autism and ADHD known to many as that information was not kept confidential at that school) get bullied. I was no exception to such a rule.
From the first day, I was an outcast, and no person wanted to get to know me during the introduction session at the beginning. All because I had a red circle (for context, we colored circles green if we were from one local public elementary school, purple from another, or red from somewhere else entirely) and no one else did. This was no surprise. I also often ate lunch at a table alone while everyone else sat with huge groups. I was never brave enough to ask if I could sit down or any of that. Social anxiety, you know? It was that way for the first year, at least.
But during that time, once I turned 11, the others at the... bigger tables... they'd start calling me weird, or insane, or whiny, or "someone unworthy of friends", which was the most common one. Eventually, as most gossip spreads, word of mouth quickly made its way to the other classes of my grade, and they began to pick on me as well. There were only two people who did not believe such words- one who's been my best friend since I was 3 and was waiting for years to see her again... and the other who would soon become one of the most backstabbing traitors I would ever meet, to put it bluntly. She wasn't the worst of said people. But. Let's call that person... Angelina. For fun.
Until I got to high school, Angelina was the first friend I had in middle school, but little did I know what she would do in the future. It's a whole mess that I shouldn't explain just yet. Back to the reasoning.
She was the only one to be concerned for me when a certain incident unfolded. A kid who was seriously... well. Crazy. Decided one day while I was drawing, that it would be an amazing idea to pick up a metal stool in the classroom and throw it right at my head. It all happened very quickly, but long story short, it hit me right in the head, and permanently scarred my left eyebrow. No one can see it as I've let them grow out a lot, but it's definitely there. I had to go to the hospital that day to get treatment. My enraged parents took his parents to court for my expensive treatments, but oh, what luck. His parents worked with the government and couldn't bear to have their reputation stained by their kid, and used his diabetes and ADHD and... guess what? Lots of money... to bribe the court to rule in their favor. They got away with it. We ended up in quite a large amount of debt. My parents had to start working late nights to manage to pay it all off, which led me to never be able to see them much... except for 20 minutes in the morning for breakfast and school preparations. The majority of my evenings were spent in solitude, doing homework. When I didn't know what to do, I just didn't do it at all, which led to my grades declining. It's a miracle I even got through that year with mostly Cs and maybe a B or two.
YOU ARE READING
Some information about Tomato Sauce's Murder Mansion
RandomJust an informational thing I want to keep on my profile- not really much of a "book" per se but stuff related to the past show TSMM I think everyone should know before choosing to support future endeavors of mine.