wanderer's moon | kaedehara kazuha

14 | empathy might be where our souls exist

As one rests by the fire, away from the cold torrent; one sits by the cold opening, away from the warmth. Nara sits there against the wall, arms resting on her knees as she quietly listens to the sombre music of fire and rain. There is a bleak look on her face, though not sad nor guilty of heart. Rather, reflective, of what and who she is as she stares out into the overcast by the downpour, imperceptibly flinching at each soundless lightning.

To distinguish between sound and noise, it all depends on the individual. A sound is something one prefers to hear, while noise is something one finds distracting. To Nara, however, it is both for which the rain droplets pattering outside the cave is soothing, while the rare strike of thunder violates her tranquillity—an uncommon occurrence where each flash brings her back to the past.

Storms and rains are not enemies of Nara's reveries, but they are reminders that mishaps occur during a particular phenomenon like this. The cavern entrance frames the rain-kissed world, fogged by heavy clouds obscuring one's visibility. There is nowhere else but the timber flames wafting within as if it was the sole trace of humanity.

Her body is no longer uncomfortable with wet patches and stains of blood, now changed into a new batch of spare clothes she brought in her travel bag. The soiled clothes were set aside, losing their purpose as parts of sleeves were torn to make way for rags. Her gaze flicker over to the deep side of the cave where the maple samurai rests, the outline of his resting silhouette casting a shadow against the cave wall. As she stares with low-lidded eyes, worn and unladen, her emotions still like the dead sea—yet there is a wave of relief and yearning and...

...love.

It has always been there all along, and Nara knows this because she had denied herself of such emotion for a long time. When love is birthed in the chambers of her heart, it fills each and every room to the brim, and Nara wills it to stop when it starts to overflow. The truth is, she considered herself unfit and undeserving of such unimportant things. She had always thought lending a hand to her village family was enough to fill the chambers of her heart, to fill the once (and always) empty heart caused by the goings of her parents. And she thought, she was nothing without them. Although even if she tries a little too hard to be independent, deep down—she had always been the lost little girl left behind.

She had met and stumbled upon many soldiers, many travellers and many locals who stayed in her mind long enough to remember, yet when it comes to Kazuha, he is somewhat troubling to forget even by sheer will. He is the wanderer who leaves a piece of his heart to everyone he meets, who comes and goes, unbeknownst to those he left yearning for. Perhaps...that is why she could not forget him, for which she kept that maple leaf as if he left a piece of him to remember.

How can rainy weather make such a difference? How can a single maple leaf lead her to this moment? How can multiple coincidences (or fate as implied by Kazuha) bring her to a conclusion that she, of all people in the world, in Inazuma, be infatuated with someone like him?

Nara could not comprehend how Kazuha has such patience—the wind is always free and open so impatience is never a foul trait. If it were any other person hearing Nara's sob story about how she is still mourning her parents and the loss of one's self, they would probably tell her, "Everyone eventually dies. The only way is to move on. You can't take years to do it. It's part of being mature. You're not a child anymore."

And it hurts to hear those imaginary words from the back of her mind. The villagers were more than aware that Nara preferred to be left alone even after a year of her mother's passing, the last of her kin. What was unbearable, however, was not their passing, but the dreadful days of watching her late mother and father bedridden with nothing but food and water. No medicine was potent enough to help them, and Nara was left hopeless as day by day, she prayed and prayed that they get to live one more day.