A Taste of Candor

Chapter 29

~Tahlia.

As I grew older, I came to realize more and more that one of the worst aspects of life as a member of a rich and affluent family was the necessity of pretense. Simply because of the family we had been born into, we were obligated to become actors. No matter what troubles we may have had to contend with, and no matter what strife burned within our walls, we were expected always to pretend there was no trouble in paradise.

How foolish that was! Nothing more than a collective lie agreed upon by society, that those with money could pay off the devil to keep him outside our houses. As if any grievances we may actually have were actually nothing more than inconvenient trifles. Little bothers we would to better not to bother with.

So naturally, when I made my way back inside after my confrontation with Keene, it was my obligation to force a smile onto my face and pretend I loved to revel in the company of Mother's guests again. Thankfully, the band shortly resumed their performance, which stole everybody's attention and directed it toward the stage, but even so, pretense was a burden as heavy as any workload carried by common men.

After the concert, Mother corralled everybody back to the dining area for some decaffeinated teas and an exchange of farewells. I managed to get away with giving a round of rather cursory goodbyes myself, and then our guests started to trickle outside. While Mother saw them off, I slipped upstairs and into my room, where I plopped down onto my bed and attempted to emotionally decompress from all the stresses bubbling inside me.

I had managed to speak once with Father about the situation with Keene before he got called off to war, but all I had really ended up with was his affirmation I had his support whether I decided to remain friends with Keene or cut him off completely. But that hardly helped me in choosing which route to take. Could I completely put this chapter behind us and remain his friend as before? Was it even possible to ignore that the only thing standing between us and a relationship in his eyes would be the simple fact I'd said "no" once?

But at the same time, frustrated as Keene's apparent deception had made me, our many years of friendship had been sweet. We had countless memories we'd created together, and throwing that all away would be a rather drastic move. Neither option that had laid itself before me appeared all too reasonable, at the end of the day.

My contemplation was cut short by a hard knock on my door that could only be Mother's. I sighed, sat up in my bed, and called out a "come in". As she entered, I braced myself for whatever infraction I must have committed at dinner, that she would now berate me for.

"You appear fatigued." Mother said with an expression in her eyes that shocked me. Understanding, empathy, maybe even compassion. "This has been a tough day for you, has it not?"

"It has." I affirmed. "I can't help but worry about Father."

She gently shut the door behind herself and took a seat beside me on the bed. "That is a boat you and I are both in together. Through all the years your father and I have been married, his departures have never been something I could cope with easily. Every time is as difficult as the last."

"He's a pillar, someone you can rely on. When he's gone, I feel like my support is gone."

"Beautifully spoken. But Tahlia, you must realize that I am your mother, and therefore, inasmuch as I am able, I will support you as well. I strive always to put your best interests at heart."

"Is that so?" I asked, words I instantly regretted.

"Of course!" she replied, her voice pitching in the process, "When was there ever any doubt?"