Jungkooks pov
When I pulled myself up, I went to Ali, Rebecka and Ari were blocking her. I held out my hand, and I felt Alis hand in mine. Squeezing it gently, taking her into the main room. She needed to hear what I had to say.
She sat across from, she was concerned for me. This was breaking my heart, I never wanted things to get this bad. I kissed her hands. Sitting next to her, the room was silent waiting for me to talk.
"So when we lived in London everything was perfect. Its when Namjoon came to visit it a started up again. When I gave my permission and I seen Namjoon already struggling not to do it then, and how comfortable you were still around him..well it made me think. Maybe if they have a one time thing. When you went to New York, I knew. We had a little fight before, but it wasn't nothing serious to where we both were upset about it." She only nodded acknowledging me.
"When you came back..it was just like last time when you and him broke up. It took you a minute to get close to me, I overlooked it. We were already living in Seoul at this point. When you told me you were pregnant with Hyun I was over the moon. We were fine.. then work became alot, and I seen someone similar to you, the alcohol had everything fuzzy. When she kissed me I knew it wasn't you. I pulled away. I went right back home.. you never forgot it. While you were renovating the old club to what it is now. You were maybe five or six months pregnant. I seen it, the bond that still was there. I really think he would have eventually found his way back to you anyway. So you were trying to tell the contractor where an art peice was going, so that wall had to be painted a certain color. He ignored you.. I seen Namjoon stepping in, before I could. Then again, no one knew I was there. The worker turned to fast and you lost your balance. You were about to fall, but he caught you. He told the worker to listen when you spoke, moved you out of the way. I couldn't see what he was doing so I walked closer. This man.. he sat you down, gave you your tea. Kissed your head, and rubbed your stomach. He didn't stop there. He kissed your stomach, and you smiled.. babe that was a dagger to my heart." She looked down, I knew she had completely forgotten about that moment.
"So it had been a while since you and him had a moment like that. You had attached yourself to me. It was nice, when you had Hyun everything was great for a bit. Until you had to go back to work. I knew I couldn't talk you out of it. I never worried when I went on my trips, you are a loyal wife." I stroked her cheek .
"Its when you got even with on Hoseok everything changed for Namjoon. He fought it for a while.. its when I had to go away the last time. I had heard you were keeping yourself busy. Not talking to him, I knew you were doing this because you loved me, and I know you still love me." She only stared at me, I just wanted to kiss her, she was so vulnerable right now.
"Well one night I was talking to Jimin, he was fixing the lighting and I heard you too.. you were fighting. He couldn't understand why you were avoiding him. I told Jimin to put it on video. You walked away from him. He asked if he did something wrong. You told him no.. babe the tension between you two was building, and I seen you fighting it. He wasn't at that moment. He pulled you close to him, and your body naturally fell into him. He asked again if he had done something wrong. You shook your head no..honestly you're so fucking loyal. I asked Jimin to make a noise turning off the video call. When he confirmed you ran off. I was relieved, but the bond you and him have always had messed with my head. My work friends were having a night out, and I knew I shouldn't have went, but I did.. the more I drank the more paranoid I got. Before I knew it I was cheating on you. I had her on her stomach in the dark, I didn't even see her..I wanted to tell you, but I was so ashamed. When you found out and you calmly gave me your ring back..at first I was like fine lets divorce. I watched you Jeon Alison, you were grieving our relationship..and I wasn't ready for it to die.. I'm still not. You cut me out again, just like last time when I was a total ass when we were younger..I knew I had to fight for you. I expected you to go running to Namjoon.. but you didn't. That night when you danced.."she nodded, I thought you left..so I didn't think anything happened..until I seen Namjoon, he was following you.. to that room..I knew this was going to be a battle. Its a battle I'm losing I know..but I can not lose you.
I am so sorry for everything, I'm not leaving you, and I don't want anyone else."
When I finished the room silent.
"How long have you and Namjoon been back together Alison?" Her father spoke with concern.
"A few months.." she looked up at him.
"He wants to marry you?" He was still keeping the same tone.
"Of course he does, he has gone over the moon for her, why wouldn't he.." Ari walked in putting in her opinion.
"Do you believe Jungkook?" He now needed to do damage control.
"Yes and no.." that hurt alot
"Yes he means it, he always means it, but he seems to always go back on his word, never intentionally." She wasn't finished talking.
"No, because I will always feel like I'm never enough for him, even though I've done everything I could to make him secure in our relationship. There wouldn't have been any lines crossed if he wouldn't have gotten in his head. Yes I know I'm to blame, I really did set boundaries with Namjoon." Everyone who had been around it seen it, she was telling the truth.
"When I did try to talk to you, because something was off you wouldn't even look at me...I received text messages instead. I knew I was no longer your princess, and it feels like empty words when you say it now. Not because of Namjoon, but because you let our love go. I was okay with being friends Namjoon. I didn't even persue him..he seen me moving on with another man that was not him. Instead of you stepping in from me moving on, it was him..do you hear how fucked up that is? Yet you want me to stay.." she just cried and I held her, she didn't pull away she just clung to me.
After that night we didn't say much to each other. I needed to work on myself, not seeking anyone, just seeking myself. She had to run this course with Namjoon.. I told her too, when I got back we would talk about everything. She cried, she told me not to go, argued that it was only going to make this worse. She was angry I was leaving her and the kids again. I was hoping this would be the very last time I did. We made love that night and next few nights after that. It felt like this was her saying goodbye as a wife. I had to make this my last time leaving, I refused to say goodbye to my wife.
I spent time with our kids, it was hard to leave, but I knew I had to come back mentally stronger.
