3 months later...
Caleb,
Hey it's me again, I really miss you. The doctor talked to me a few days ago, she said you haven't shown any signs of waking up yet. I didn't cry though..are you proud of me? Im trying, Caleb, I really am. Im trying so hard to be happy but I just don't think it's possible right now. Oh and Taylor came by today, she told me that I was looking a little better but I don't feel any better. I just wish you would wake up. Please wake up.
-Allison
****
I slowly shut the tiny notebook and stuffed it under my pillow. Quickly jumping up, I throw my shoes on and push out the door of my front house. I run towards the hospital knowing it will take me at least 45 minutes if i walk. 'I wonder if Caleb has shown any signs of waking up today?' I think silently to myself, but in the back of my head I know he hasn't. I don't think I have given up hope yet though, because I haven't, not yet.
I quietly walk into room 284 and pull a chair up to the bed. Leaning over, I kiss Calebs cheek softly. About an hour later, a nurse walks into the room and starts her daily checkup with Caleb. I take this as a sign to leave, so I get up and walk out attempting to put a smile on my face but failing miserably.
Once I reach the outside of the hospital I pull out my iPhone and text Taylor.
'Hey can we do something today, I want to get my mind off of things for a little?'
'Sure, mall?'
I quickly reply with a yes and run home. I jump in the shower and decide to curl my hair into loose curls. When I am done with my hair, I throw on a pair of jean shorts and a pink flowy tanktop. I lived in California, so I didn't have to worry about getting cold even though it was late October.
***
I had at least 10 messages from Taylor, asking about my location. As I walked into the building, I saw the back of her & texted her to turn around. I heard her pone beep & saw her check her message. She did as I said, slowly but saw me & ran to embrace me in a hug.
"Allison!" She screamed.
"Taylor!" I copied her.
We made our way through the mall when we tried to walk into the Hollister store. Our path was blocked by a shirtless guy.
"Um, excuse me." I said trying to squeeze through. He stood there, not moving. I pushed past him & made sure I bumped his shoulder.
"Excuse you." He sassed to me.
I rolled my eyes, "Whatever."
"Jesus, who died." He scoffed.
Thats it. He drew the line. I couldnt keep my anger inside. I lashed out. And slapped him.
He grasped his face & loooked shocked.
"C'mon Allison." Taylor was begging me to walk away.
"Whats your problem?" He said.
"You." I almost screamed.
He cocked his head to the side.
"Its people like you that make me lose all faith in humnaity."
"All I asked, was who died."
"Or almost died.." I mumbled.
I was drawing a crowd. They all stared at me.
"You know, just because youre a hollister model & you think girls go weak in the knees when they see you, dosent mean you can be a jerk."
"Get over it. I said the wrong thing."
I knew I was overreacting, & not everyone knows that my boyfriend is in the hospital, but you should never bring up death. To anyone.
"Hey lets go" Taylors voice broke me out of my angry rant inside my head. I quickly agreed and ran far from the tiny little store. When Taylor finally caught up with me, she grabbed my wrist and pulled me out of the mall.
***
Taylor and I said our goodbyes only a few minutes after we walked outside. Once she walked away, I quickly turned around and walked home. I was tired, pissed, and alone.
Today sucked.
