Lost in Yesterday

Chapter 3

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"Simula nung sumapi ako sa pag oorganisa, namulat ako sa lahat. Mula sa mga nakaupo sa taas— o ang tinatawag naming mga naghaharing uri, hanggang sa mga nasa pinakababa ng tatsulok." 

Hearing you talk about what you've learned being a part of a Democratic Organization, also interests me. Sitting on top of the grass surface with our isaw sticks. 

I don't usually go here in UP Diliman, but for her I will.

"Oh.. I see. So, what's it like being the Chairperson? Mahirap? Kasi nasa kalsada kayo frequently. Tapos, yung mga pulis pa. Is there one time na you got terrified of them?" I asked.

She chuckled softly before answering me, "Noong unang pasok ko sa organisasyon, takot pa ako syempre. Kasi hindi namin alam kung anong gagawin sa amin ng mga pulis na yun. Baka mamaya huliin ako, tutukan ako ng baril. Pero, nung tumagal, nawala naman na at kaya ko na silang harapin." 

The increasing rate of innocent activists being captured or even killed in this country is agitating. I am afraid one day, I will cover her being locked up or worse.. covering her dead body.

Which of course, is now my biggest fear. I want to protect her, even if it costs my life as well.

"Has it been hard? Like, naging abala na ba sa'yo ang mga pulis one time? Just, them coming right at you or whatever?" I once again, asked a question.

"May isang ganap noon na nakuha nila pangalan ko. Pero, buti nalang hindi buong impormasyon ko. Bilang Chairperson nga, ako yung magiging main target ng mga pulisya. Pero syempre, yung mga kasamahan ko, palagi nila akong pinoprotektahan at ganun din ginagawa ko sakanila." 

Hearing her stories about those pesky police trying to capture and kill activists, it actually makes me see her as a woman who has strong sense of courage and capability. As I said— I wish I was as vigorous as her.

I know being a member of an Organization like hers is hard, but being the Chairperson of it? Oh boy, you better watch out. 

The authorities will trail upon your path.

"How about your family? Are they doing good naman? Mahirap 'yan. Sometimes, the authorities will also threaten families of people like you," I uttered.

"They're okay, for now. Pero, sinusubukan ko pa ring maging maingat. Alam kong delikado yung ginagawa ko pero ibang usapan na kasi kapag dinamay na yung mismong pamilya ko. Kaya hangga't maaari, maingat pa rin ako sa sarili ko at sa impormasyon ko." her answer.

Right. You still have to maintain being careful despite getting your life at sake. At dangerous tasks like this, you also have to keep an eye at your families. 

"Lek! Nandito ka lang pala! Tara na, andun na raw sila sa tapat ng Oblation," probably, one of Leonor's comrade, "Saka nga pala, sino kasama mo? Ikaw lek ah, hindi ka nagsasabi sa amin na may shota ka na."

Leonor stood up from where she was sitting beside me with a laugh, and so I stood up after her as well. "Ikaw talaga kas, kaibigan ko lang 'to. Yung nag coverage sa ating nung last mob? Sa Ateneo 'to nag-aaral, internship niya kasi ay pag cover up sa mga mobilizations." Leonor explained.

But at the same time, I wouldn't mind being called as your girlfriend. Heck, that's what I want to hear from you anyway. For now, we have to remain friends.

"Ah ganun ba, kala ko meron ka na lek. Hello po! Ako po si Margareth. Kasamahan po ni Chairperson Leonor sa Org! Maraming salamat po sa pag coverage po sa amin!" 

This is actually my first time knowing people who are part of Mass Organizations. I didn't have any expectations around them but all I am going to say is that— even if they might sound aggressive to some at times, they're actually the nicest and the most helpful around. 

They're just doing what they're meant to do, fight for the better future and our human rights.

"Hello Margareth. May meeting kayo with the Org?" I asked. 

"Ay yes po! Talakayan po para sa mga gustong sumapi pa! Si Lek nalang po kasi hinihintay." 

Lek is what they call to Leonor, that's new. "I see. Sige na Leonor, punta ka na dun, we'll meet again some other time. Thank you sa time!" I said my goodbyes with a smile.

Oh, she smiled at me back. Her iconic smile. It's angelic at the sight.

"Leo nalang tawagin mo sa akin, para maikli. Sa susunod ulit! Sama ka sa amin pag pwede ka! Every one's welcome!" 

Leo.. what a cute nickname. "Okay, Leo. Also, call me Reese nalang din. See you again soon, Chair!" 

"Hanggang sa muling pagkikita, Reese!"

And as she waved her hand at me, she turned around with Margareth to finally walk towards the Oblation. I was just standing there, looking at her till her presence disappeared from my eyesight.

Leo, I hope to tell you one day that I yearn for you.

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