The Freshmen

Prologue

Sam Pepper never thought he would see the book again. He thought the pictures holding the timeless memories were gone, vanished, leaving him with an uncomfortable void in his soul. High school was ages ago, so it was hard to fathom he still had anything from those days. Though, there it was, under the yearbooks and the diploma he somehow managed to receive: "Our Book." There it had stated, with a black and bold Sharpie, written neatly. The cover was red, in relations to Sam's beating heart that pumped such adolescent fervency back then the current state of it pales in comparison. It was wide, allowing the infamous Polaroid pictures of his past to have enough space to rest. He missed it. He missed the days when he ran wildly and free, the days in which he made some of his saddest and happiest but overall most impactful memories in his thirty five years on this planet earth.

Most of all, standing high on the pedestal with the angels up above, he missed Daniel Howell. His best friend, his lover, and the one he wished he could spend the rest of his life with. He never got the chance. Life had happened. High school was just a mere smudge in their lives. The days they recalled as lasting eternally, and the age they stated as permanent, carried on and evolved. Boyfriends and girlfriends parted, going on different paths. Best friends became nothing but acquaintances, or in most cases strangers. Things had changed, a new chapter begun, but Sam Pepper would always remember the years before him and the one he had to leave behind. He'd remember him, every single inch of his flawless anatomy. He'd remember the taste of his kisses. Oh God, they were an addiction, his addiction, and an addiction he never wanted to let go of. He'd just melt into Dan's arms. His whole body going Novocain numb, his breath unable to come out of his lungs. The way he felt. The way their bodies fit perfectly, two puzzle pieces that connected easily and naturally. The feeling of Dan's fingertips trailing down his spine, causing inevitable tingles and the stereotypical chills to engage from the contact. The way those same fingers intertwined with his erupted a certain warmth inside of him, and the way their hands molded together. No other hand could be placed in his and have the same effect, nor did it deserve to be placed there.

It wasn't just the other boy's body that kept Sam coming back, oh no. It was his internal being, the man beneath the perfect body and big, beautiful brown eyes that Sam always got lost in one way or another. There was a massive heart placed inside of the beautiful boy, if Sam was certain about anything. He'd put you before everything else, always. There wasn't a time Dan didn't nurture another's soul, or try and mend a broken heart. His optimism shined and it revived Sam. Dan made him feel alive. His humor was unlike any other, and he made Sam laugh so hard he had tears coming out of his eyes. Dan loved knowing he was the cause of this laughter, though he never admitted it to anyone. Everyone could see it though, it was beyond obviousness. They had good times together, they experienced four years of their young life in unison, side by side. Sam would never, ever forget the times in which they endured hand and hand. They were etched in his brain permanently, and no other could produce memories greater than or equal to those of Samuel Pepper and Daniel Howell, nor was anyone else worthy of getting the chance. As shallow as the statement was, Sam knew it was true. There would be no replacement to the one whom held his heart for years. There was no one as Dan as Dan was, and there would never be. Sam smiled nostalgically, allowing his lean fingers to open the book. He flipped to the first page, and his black heart began to be painted with red such as it had been colored many years prior. And so it read; "Chapter One, Freshman Year."