Our 7th Grade Year - Shorts

Number 6 - Goodbye. 💧💌

They are aged up to 16, 10th grade
Zee, Nick [Dating]
Maddie, Shawn [Dating]
River, Alyssa? [Crush]
Klay, Noah [Dating]
Word count ::: 1266

Angst <3
TW : Self harm, Pills, Fighting, Homophobia, dysphoria
Read at you own risk.

Zees POV.
It was a regular Tuesday morning as I was walking to school but then I felt eyes on me. They felt mildly uncomfortable but I kept walking. I didn't live far from the school so it didn't take long to get there. I walked inside the building where half of my issues started. I walked over over to my friends as they were talking, hearing the name Alyssa come up quite often from River. I felt more eyes on me and I looked around.
No one.
I went up to my friends and River immediately walked away. "What's with her?" I asked Maddie and Klay."She saw Alyssa!!" Maddie squealed happily. "Who's... who's Alyssa?" "She didn't tell you?! It's her crush!!" "Oh. I gotta.. I gotta go." I walked away and into the girls restroom. I heard someone, which didn't bother me. I walked into the farthest stall and sat down. I sat on the filthy ground. "Disgusting." I thought to myself. "Why wouldn't River tell me her new crush..? She usually tells me everything..." I felt hot tears stream down my cheeks. I heard another person came in. Three people come in. I cover my mouth in case I made a sound. I heard laughing, laughing I recognized all too well. "Zaida..." I brought my knees to my head and hoped she didn't know I was in here.
I feel eyes on me again. But who would be looking at me..? "Oh.. who do we have here~?" She knocked on the stall I was in. I said nothing. She looked at me through the crack of the stall. "Oh~ Miss Namechanger~" "what do you want Zaida..?" More hot tears roll down my cheek. "F.. fuck off Zaida.." "aww, the baby said her first words." She shoved a pin through the crack of the stall and unlocked the door. Shit. I looked up at her eyes, my eyes widened as they darted from her to her two other minions. I stood up and quickly tried to shove my way through her. "Hey! Not yet." She threw a quick punch to my face, knocking me down. I stood up again, my nose feeling out of place.I punched her back, as hard as I could. Her eye watered up as her minion kicked my knee. Not very affective, pain wise, but affective, balance wise. I lost my balance but caught myself. Lucky. Zaida punched my face, over and over so I couldn't get her back. I was powerful enough to knock her out but I needed a few hits on her. She punched my throat and I gagged, she punched my stomach a few times, punched my nose and then everything went black.

I woke up in the bathroom stall. I couldn't remember anything so I looked around and saw blood. I felt like passing out again. I heard someone come into the bathroom and I locked the stall, remembering the blood stained ground. "Zee?! Are you in here?!" It was Maddie! "Madds..?" "Zee! Zee let me in..!" She knocked on my stall. "N.. no.." "should I go get Nick..?" "It'll be weird for a boy to go into the girls bathroom, Madds.." "right.. uhm, we'll sneak him in?" "You can try.." I heard her leave the bathroom and heard her voice get more distant from me. I started crying, biting my arm to be quiet. In minutes Maddie came back, or at least I thought it was Maddie. "Zee..?" I heard a quiet voice and then a knock on the stall. I looked through the crack of the stall and saw Nick. I opened the door slowly, revealing myself. Myself being a very bloody and bruised kid. "Zee?!" The loud noise startled me as I stepped back.
He took a look at me, left a kiss on my forehead and whispered. "It'll be okay.. don't worry.." I leaned my head against him as I began crying again. I never noticed the pain in my side but when Nick touched them, a winced in pain. He let go, making sure not to touch there and put his hand on my waist. Which didn't hurt as bad so I dealt with it.
We stayed here for about 10 minutes. It was calming. Every so often he'd kiss my head and whisper into my ear reassuring words. "Nicky..." I looked up at him. "Yea? Something hurt? What's wrong?" "No, no.. nothings wrong.. I'm going to sneak out the school. I'm sorry..." "no, it's okay. I understand why." He gave me a small kiss and rubbed my cheek with his thumb. "I love you. Be safe." We stepped out of the stall and I grabbed my bag. I just held it in my hand in case I hurt my shoulder hurt me. I walked out of the bathroom quickly to bolt out of the school building. Thank god.
I began walking home as I heard someone yell out to me. "Hey f@g! Where you going?!" They yelled but I ran. I couldn't stand it. After 10 minutes of running, I reached my apartment. I ran past the lady at the counter who I loved. "Sweetie? What's wrong?" She looked at me with a soft look. "School started a few hours ago, why back so early?" "Ruth..." I looked at her and she noticed everything. "Oh baby.. it's okay.. are gonna clean up?" I nod my head and run up the stairs. 3 flights just to get the my floor. I need to get the whole way to the end. I live in 3D and it's not the far but I couldn't see the best. I ran down to my apartment, got out my key and opened the door. No one was home and I prayed they wouldn't arrive til late. I searched a few cupboards in the kitchen and found exactly what I needed
Pills.
I grabbed them quickly, grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, put about 15 pill in my mouth and swallowed. I have no idea what the side affects were and sat there for a minute. Nothing happened.
Nothing happened just yet.
I walked into the bathroom, looked at my body. My very bloody body. I turned to my side and felt my chest. I could feel my chest stick out. It felt horrible. I felt horrible. I started crying again as I took off my shirt. Then my binder. I took a blade i had been hiding in my pocket all day. I planned this earlier but I couldn't. I cut my chest. Hopefully off. Each cut deeper than the last. It hurt but also felt good. I deserved this and I knew it. No one cared enough to come 'save' me. I didn't need saving. I need a miracle. A miracle that could make me happy again. I knew that would never happen so this was my next resort. I cut my stomach. I cut my arms. I looked at myself one last time and cut my throat. Shit that hurt but I deserved it. I derived it too much. I slipped on my shirt. I stumbled out of the bathroom and to the couch. I sat down and everything went pitch dark. I couldn't see a thing. Did I pass out? Am I dead?!
One or the other, I hope it's the second option.