Touya and Hawks had briefly dated towards the end of their highschool years but then Touya thought it'd be a good idea to fake his death and try to murder Hawks on multiple occasions. Hawks being not an idiot soon found out about Touya's new identity and gave him a second despite that being the dumbest decision ever.
--
"Touya, I have a job, do you have a job?" Hawks asked
"Yes, I kick your ass for a living" Touya replied
It'd been another fight over work. They had these pretty much every morning when Hawks got ready for work. Dabi would try to get Hawks to stay and Hawks would go off on his rants saying that he needed to work to provide for the 2 of them and blah blah blah and Touya would get mad at the fact that he was basically a housewife. Touya had a job too it just required less demanding shifts, basically he kicked ass and did drugs all day. Meanwhile Hawks also kicked ass and arrested people that did drugs all day. So there was an issue here because Hawks should have arrested Touya, he should have arrested him the first time the reunited. He should have arrested him when he finally got him alone. He should have arrested him on they're one year anniversary. Buuuut here he was.
"I meant a real job you fucking idiot" Hawks shot back
Touya threw a pillow at Hawks from the bed and Hawks left. This is pretty much how they would say goodbye every morning.
--
Hawks was in a meeting with the commission when he got a phone call. He saw the user and of course it was Touya. He had him under "old guy stalker" in his phone. He hung up and surely enough Dabi called him back. He finally took an exit from the meeting to briefly scold his boyfriend for calling him during a meeting. He picked up the phone.
"Dabi I am in a fucking meetin-" Hawks was cut off
"Dude chickens only live for 5-10 years how the fuck are you alive right now?" Touya asked.
"THATS WHAT YOU FUCKING CALLED ME FOR?!" Hawks yelled
"Yeah it is, I genuinely wanna know." Touya said
"Shove it up your ass and don't ever call this number again old man" Hawks retaliated
"Love you too babe" Dabi hung up.
--
"I should have just arrested you a long time ago, you fucked up dude" Hawks said out of nowhere.
They were lying awake together in Hawks' apartment at around 5am.
"What the fuck?" Touya asked
"You suck ass and you ruined my life for like 5 years I thought you were dead" Hawks explained
"and? I'm back now, duhhh" Dabi rolled his eyes.
"Yeah you're lucky I'm giving you a second chance you fucking walking piece of bacon" Hawks rolled over and onto the floor and then cried out the lyrics to All The Way (I Believe In Steve) and then he fell asleep.
--
old guy stalker
dude I think I just saw god
Hawks
What.
old stalker guy
ok so i was doing some psychedelic drugs right and I think i saw god
Hawks
What did I say about never contacting this number again?
old guy stalker
you said to never call you again
Hawks
Go fuck yourself
old guy stalker
ok :)
Hawks
What the fuck does that mean dude
old guy stalker
it means ok :D
--
and then they got married ta daaaa
