I was the unwanted child... the unplanned child... I was the one who had to work the hardest for the things I wanted... I was the one who was forgotten at Walmart if I didn't keep up... I always had to work for the things I needed... I was bullied for 7 years... not my perfect sister... my sister got everything she asked for and when these things broke she gave them to me... when I started eating my feelings they started to take notice... they had to by me clothes... they got me dresses and things that were pink... I wasn't that girl any longer... I was new and improved from the bulling... and then to top it off the one person who understood what I was going through died...what was I to do?
I couldn't do anything. I cried for weeks after. Then all I could think was it was my fault... I was a bad person.
I know better now though. It's not like it took years to figure it out but I did eventually.
I was picked last for everything in school and it was hard after I gained so much weight. Until I found a sport that would change my life forever... Soccer. Well it was more than a sport to me it was the family I never had with lots of really cool people. I also found music. Pierce the Veil, Black Veil Brides, Mayday Parade, He Is We, Panic! At the Disco, Three Days Grace, and many more. They helped me through a really rough patch in my life... I had started cutting shortly after my grandmother died... I still do it too... Ops! I didn't say that... any way I was horrible for a long time...
Why am I telling you all of this... well it's because I'm not famous but I still find this funny... I mean really an 8 year old girl who starts cutting because some people were mean to her... wow... then to top that off she is left with the doubts that they were all right.
They had said: worthless, bitch, whore, cunt, 10 dick eating pussy licking whore, no one will love you, you hide Twinkies in your coffee, you'll only ever be a piece of crap on the floor, and so much more that I can't even remember. When I found that music can make all of that disappear... they ripped the headphones out of my ears and said even more nasty and cruel things... after a while it was just repeats... one day I left my headphones at my house, that we much later sold to move here, was the day the bulling stopped... I just love this part of the story... they came at me about being a lesbian like they had many times before... I through it back in their face... one of them a girl named Jenifer well she was a really 10 dick eating pussy licking whore... she was a lesbian or bi but I don't quite know which... any way back to what I was saying I through it back at her... she tried to beat me up... her cousins stopped her and needless to say she got kicked off the bus... I think... I don't really know what happened...
So that's my story and I'm Joe by the way... I hope you like the rest of my story as it unfurls... until the next chapter then...
