Come See Me, and Come Lonely

Getting Personal

Luke Vincent
2200 A South Pomona Rd.
Pomona, NJ

Dear Ms. Mallory,

Thank you for your kind offer to sign my collection of eight Cara Friday first editions. I don't know what to say. You are an extremely generous and gracious lady, and may I just point out again what a jerk your ex is. His loss. A package of books should arrive shortly, along with return postage and a self-addressed sticker for you to put on the box and mail back. Please inscribe them to Luke.

In case you're busy with your latest masterpiece, I want you to know that there's no hurry in doing me this favor. I know the books are safe with you. I've already read them, so don't waste a minute of your time on this chore. And thanks for the tip about the new Cara story in Criminal Minds. Very enjoyable. Loved your descriptions! When our girl breaks into Lester's room to search for the documents and finds that he has been shot in the head while sleeping, I was afraid that the shooter would come tiptoeing out of the bathroom and get her next. This can happen.

But then I tell myself: CJ Mallory is in charge here, and she is not going to shoot the hand that feeds her, and, sure enough, all is well. Interesting that you said Lester's cheek felt like warm leather to Cara's touch, when she checked to see if he was really dead. I've always thought that deceased persons felt like a package of plastic wrapped meat like you get at the deli. But your description is more elegant. I suppose Cara was too delicate to mention the smell. She couldn't miss it.

And I was a little surprised to hear that there was a spatter pattern of blood on the wall by the bed. Surely if the individual is lying down, you would put the barrel just above his ear and aim downward. Shooting your mark in the temple is messy, no question about that, but people have been known to recover. You want to take out as much of the brain case as possible with one slug so as to guarantee a clean kill. Of course, as I recall, the murderer was the blackmailed Catholic priest, so maybe he didn't know from forensic medicine. Anyway, it was a great story, and you fooled me completely.

I especially liked the neat touch of the shooter's having put a roll of toilet paper under Lester's chin and unrolling it to make a necktie. Showed his opinion of the deceased. A nice bit of symbolism, which was not lost on yours truly.

Speaking of technical difficulties, your letter mentioned that you had a dilemma in your current project. What's this one called? I'll mention it to my book dealer. Can I be so bold as to make a suggestion about the gun on the airplane problem? (I don't want you locked away because the FAA has you pegged as a suspected terrorist.) You did say that the individual in question was a pro this time, I believe. I'll try to forget these details when I buy the book. I want to figure it out fair and square with no advance warnings.

Probably the guy would pack his weapon in his checked luggage, dismantled and, it goes without saying, unloaded. This is a perfectly legal and therefore hassle-free mode of transport, but perhaps that lacks the necessary drama for the plot. Or maybe the guy doesn't trust the airline to get his bags and him to the same destination...a very wise concern in my experience. So, he has to have the thing in a carry-on or concealed about his person.

Let me recommend that you not make the weapon a .44 Magnum, since, with all due respect to the talented Clint Eastwood, this is not what a gentleman in the sanction business would use professionally. There are some very nice firearms out now that are made of space-age polymers. The 9mm Glock is a very good one that can perform adequately in the field and still not be unduly ostentatious. This piece, dismantled in a carry-on baggage, should make it through airport security, as the polymer parts of the pistol will not register on the metal detector, and the metal parts can be concealed in, say, a false bottomed can of shaving cream.