Dobby x Joker a love most foul

super cool swag chapter

~~~Joker POV

The Joker was a man who needed to teach the world a lesson, that's what he did, he's the joker after all, he just makes funny jokes, like a teacher does and despite his large following and Instagram account with over 20k followers, he often found himself lonely.

He had made a friend, he had many friends, but this friend was different, his name was Serious Black, which was so funny because the Joker's name was The Joker.

He and serious discussed many topics, including the fact that Serious was an illegal fugitive running from the British ministry of magical defense which the joker knew all about.

One day the Joker was chatting with Serious and it went a little like this, "man, I just really want someone who will warm my bed when I'm not in it, y'know?", The Joker proclaimed.

Serious, thinking this was the joker talking about like a house maid who will put those gross water warmer things that I've only ever seen on television under his sheets and recalled Harry Potter, his bro, mentioning Dobby who was headed to Gotham, Dobby was a house elf, "oh yeah! I might be able to help with that!!😃", He stated.

"Really..? I mean... It's kind of embarrassing of me to say, but.. thanks I guess.", The Joker replied, he took another sip of his chocolate milk, because they were at a bar and I don't know the name of any alcohol that I think the Joker would drink.

"No problemo!😁👍 Happy to help!!".

And serious gave joker the name and number of the newly arrived Dobby.

Joker felt weird, he had never met someone this way and the last physical touch he got from someone he felt romantic towards was that one time Batman headbutt him like a month ago. Joker dialed the number, it took a long time for it to pick up, but when it did, the tiniest shrill voice spoke "hello? 🥺".

The Joker got flustered and spoke quickly, "u-uhm! Hello-! It's the joker..! I'm uh calling because well, um your friend Serious gave me this number and he uh said--- thatyourereallycoolandthatidlikeyouwannahngoitlatersometimemaybe?", The Joker became so embarrassed that he threw the phone down and stabbed a pencil through his hand.

"Like an interview..?🌝", The voice asked.

"Yes! Wait-".

"Oh Dobby is pleased to hear this! Only a day in America and already Dobby has found himself work!".

The phone hung up and the joker felt miserable, he didn't even want to go to the interview now, he just wanted to-- all of a sudden some crashing sounds came from the other room, the Joker honestly couldn't have cared less, it was probably one of Salina's dumb cats, Salina was a friend of Poison Ivy's and she was a friend of Harley Quinn and Harley was a friend of the Joker's and the Joker knew Batman so there's that scenario that will be important later I think.

When the door opened to the Joker's dimly lit office he was expecting the cat to come in and meowed like no one cared about it or ever even fed it ever, but instead the ugliest thing the joker had ever seen (and he had looked in the mirror) walked in, he screamed and through the closest thing on his desk at it, which happened to be a throwing knife.

It just missed 'the thing' which was Dobby, The joker stood to his feet and ran over to it, "I AM SO SORRY! IT'S A FORCE OF HABIT!", the Joker yelled pulling the short elf away from the knife that he threw and missed and shutting the door.

"Oh no, it's fine, it's really often people throw things at Dobby!😬🤗".

"Oh, uh sorry again, but uh..  what the hell are you?", The Joker asked.

"I'm Dobby sir, the house elf, we scheduled an interview, was now not meant for Dobby?", Dobby waited a moment, staring into the handsome man in clown makeup's expression and began hitting himself "STUPID DUMB UGLY DOBBY!!", he yelled as he did.

The Joker ran over and pulled Dobby's hands away and looked Dobby in the eyes, "stop! What are you doing?!", People shouldn't beat themselves, Batman did that for them!

Dobby looked into the man's inch worm green eyes and began to blush, he looked away and pulled back, Joker let him go, Dobby hit the ground and curled into a ball and began sobbing uncontrollably, it was the most pathetic thing the joker had ever seen (and he had looked in the mirror)

-A/N right imma call it there, this is the worst piece of literature I've ever written or read, I'll try and add sense to this ending in the next chapter, but it's 3 am and after this I think I want to sleep.