short stories

memory

the moment I realized he was becoming a memory I thought I was going to die. I cried; I couldn't stop crying. my heart was in my throat, and I thought I was going to throw up, I didn't, but the pit in my stomach made me wish I would just to get rid of it. my fingers and my toes went numb and I could hardly feel my own body. nothing could prepare me for having to let you go, not when you were ingrained in every part of me. 

it hurt just as much when you came back for a bit. at first, I thought it would make me happier but then you disappeared again. That's when I realized you didn't come back for the sake of fixing our friendship. you just needed me to forgive you so that my brother would forgive you too. you knew he'd never really forgive you unless I forgave you, so for the sake of your friendship you came back. I should have known something was up, I mean why would you ever come back out of nowhere to fix things with me? That's just not who you are. you've disappeared for 2 weeks now, and I miss you so much I might die of a broken heart. you'll never really care though, will you? you could never care about me, fuck you didn't even have time for me; you made that very clear. you told my brother it wasn't that you didn't have time you just didn't have time for me. I found that out in class; I cried again. 

despite all this you're still somehow my most precious memory. my most painful one sure; but definitely my most precious one.