Beatiful Strangers

5~Jesse's P.O.V.

The dinner with Paris' family went better than I expected.
For one thing her mom finally got around to liking Drew.
I almost kind of felt bad for the guy, she was being hard on him.
The night ended with me promising to link with Paris soon and congratulating Heaven one last time.

On my way out, I turned around to say something I can't quite remember anymore and I saw Drew suddenly get tense. I turned back around and walked out.
I guess I wasn't really paying attention to him cause now that I think about it, he looked like he was walking on eggshells almost throughout.
Did I make him uncomfortable? Did Paris tell him something that he had no business knowing?
I get that she'd want to tell her boyfriend everything but knowing her, she worded it in a way that made everything seem more complicated than it actually was.
And not every guy would be comfortable with his girlfriend being around an 'ex' or whatever I am to her.
She should have just not said anything. We'd all already gotten so good at pretending nothing ever happened I was almost starting to believe it.
I wanted to do everything for my best friend and I still do but sometimes I wonder if we couldn't have worked things out differently. I don't really wish it did, but I sometimes I get curious.

On my way to my studio apartment, I get a text from Jenny asking if we can meet up.
Every time I think about her or I'm with her I feel an immense amount of guilt.
We talked about our relationship beforehand and she knows I'm not ready for any sort of long term commitment but I know she wants all those things I can't give her and I feel guilty that she has to compromise for me and I get away with all the shit I've done to hurt her since we got together.

I reply that I'm already on my way home and I want to call it a night hoping she gets the message.
She texts back that she'll be by my place in a few minutes.

God. I can't deal with this right now. I already feel guilty and I don't know if I can face her today.
I want to let go so she can do her own thing but I'm selfish and I really like her.
I like her a lot more than a lot of the other girls I've been with in a while and I actually really want it to work between us.

She's the first girl that doesn't mind that Heaven and I are best friends. A lot of the other ones found it weird and said that most best friends that were as close as I and Heaven ended up together but before we eventually did we used a lot of people's hearts to figure out ours.
One of my exes, Sam said something along the lines of "Best friends like that are usually made for each other but they take a long time to figure it out and before they do, there's usually a lot of casualties."
I get where they were all coming from but I really wanted a girl who loved Heaven as much as I love her. I guess Jenny is as good as I'll ever get.

Once I get home, I park my metallic grey Toyota Supra in the lot and head upstairs.
I'm just going to take a shower and sleep. I was going to work on my current painting some more but I'm not in the right mind space for any of that right now.

I'm stepping out of the shower when I hear a light knock on my door.
SHIT. I was too in my thoughts to remember to tell Jenny not to come anymore.

I go to the door so I can let her in.
She throws her hands around my neck and plants a kiss on my lips.
"How was the family dinner?" She asks after I break the kiss

"It was ok. Paris is back, she came back with a boyfriend finally."
Jenny removes her arms from around my neck and studies my face like there's something she doesn't understand

"What's that look on your face?"

"What? What look? I'm just trying to see how you really feel about Paris and her 'boyfriend'"

I laugh nervously "How I feel? How am I supposed to feel?"

"Come on Jesse." She says rolling her eyes
"Heaven already told me. I don't think it's weird, I just want to know how you feel about her being back with her boyfriend even if it's after all this time."