𝐴𝑐𝑎𝑡𝑎𝑙𝑒𝑝𝑠𝑦 ᯾ 𝐹.𝐻𝑎𝑟𝑔𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑠

𝑊𝑒 𝑂𝑛𝑙𝑦 𝑆𝑒𝑒 𝐸𝑎𝑐ℎ𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑡 𝑊𝑒𝑑𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠...

To be honest, when Ash heard the news that Reginald Hargreeves had died, they really didn't care.. well until they caught wind that he was a fucking billionaire. 

You see, Ash is what many people would call a thief.

But of course, things can't be that easy, they had some activities to do most of the week, so they would have to wait until the 24th.

☂︎ --------- ☂︎

They had made it into the house.. hooray! However, music was playing in this house. This normally wouldn't be a big problem if the only person living in this house wasn't dead, which meant that there was people in the house. They'd broken into a room without people, thank fuck, but people were still in the house.

They weren't ditching this house now, it was beneficial for them to break into rich persons house; and no one could disagree with them on that, but as you would expect, it's harder to break into a rich persons house than it was a normal one, and to top it all off they had to do it in broad daylight which meant it was easier to be caught!

As they were pondering to themself, they heard a loud noise and a blue flash. They told themself to just focus; the people in the house would leave to investigate the blue thing and make their job 99.9% easier!

☂︎ --------- ☂︎

When all the people had left, Ash snuck into the courtyard and hid behind some kind of fancy thing near the entrance, slightly peaking their head out. Now that they could see the blue thing closer, it looked almost like a portal.

"What is it!" A woman shouted

"Don't get too close" Another woman with curly hair had also shouted, albeit with a slightly more relaxed tone.

"Yeah, no shit" A man who looked like if Spiderman and batman had some weird mixed clone said, the only thing that had even slightly scared them about his appearance was the vast amount of knives on his back. The sheer amount of knives on his back combined with the big dude next to him gave them some motivation to not get caught.

"Looks like either a temporal anomaly or a miniature black hole!" The dude next to ikea batman reported. "Pretty big difference there, Paul Bunyan" IKEA batman practically seethed.

It was just then when a very... how should they put this? A very interesting looking man came running in shouting "out of the way!". Ash could've sworn their whole life flashed before their eyes in that very moment, if that man had looked even a tiny bit to the left, they would've been seen immediately. The man threw a fire extinguisher into the blue orb thingy.

"What is that gonna do!?" The curly haired woman asked. "I don't know, do you have a better idea!?" The man replied.

The orb made a semi-loud noise and the big man pushed everyone behind him "stand behind me!" He commanded. "Yeah, stand behind us!" Ash doesn't know who ikea batman thinks hes protecting but they'll let him live out his fantasies considering if they don't they'll go to juvenile detention most likely.

"I vote for running, c'mon!" The fire extinguisher man, and the only one who seemingly had basic common sense suggested

Suddenly a kid about Ash's age falls out of the portal with a very oversized suit

"So, does anyone see little Number Five or is it just me?" The fire extinguisher man asked

The kid or maybe I should call him Five, stumbled back a bit before looking down at himself...

"Shit"

☂︎ --------- ☂︎

While raiding the family's fridge (they had 3 fridges for some reason), they decided to do a little eavesdropping. "What's the date? The exact date" Five asked. "The 24th" The woman who I had learned was called Vanya answered. "Of?" Five asked again. "March" Allison finished

"Good" Five said. Okay, are we not gonna question the fact he came out of a portal? No? Just me pondering this?

"So, are we gonna talk about what just happened?" Luther asked, it was a valid question. Five continued making his sandwich as if he didn't even hear Luther. "It's been 17 years!" Luther stood up. Five looks up at Luther "It's been alot longer than that" Five scoffs. And, as if this day couldn't get any more crazy, THIS.DUDE.FUCKING.TELEPORTED.

Not only were they robbing a house with 6 people in it, they were robbing a house with 6 people in it AND ONE OF THEM COULD TELEPORT

"I haven't missed that" Luther said dully. "Where'd you go?" Diego asked. "The future. It's shit, by the way" Five answered leaving Ash dumbfounded. Not only has this boy teleported, but he went to the future too!? "Called it" Klaus giggled as if going to the future was a completely normal occurrence

"Should've listened to the old man. You know, jumping through space is one thing, but jumping through time is a toss of the dice" Five said. "Oh, nice dress" Five pointed to Klaus. "Oh. Well. Danke"

"Okay but, how'd you get back?" Vanya questioned. "In the end I had to project my conscience to a quantum state version of myself that exists across every instance of time" Five answered. "That makes no sense" Deigo stated. "Well, it would if you were smarter" Five said. Deigo made some kind of attempt to fight Five but was interrupted by Luther.

"Hm, guess I missed the funeral. Heart failure, huh?"

"Yeah"

"No"

Diego and Luther spoke in unison. "Nice to see nothing's changed" Five went silent before speaking again "Oh yeah, one thing before I go?" Five said...ominously? "Yeah?" Most of the family said in unison. Before they knew it Five had teleported and Ash was being held in the air by their collar "Do any of you know who this dumbass is?" 

⚠︎ --------- ⚠︎

Hi! Tbh I'm not too happy with how this turned out but it could've gone worse. If you want to ask some questions about Ash, you can and I'll try answer as honestly as I can (Without giving spoilers for future 🕺ANGST💃 regarding the character) Also, I am aware that is not the full title of the episode, it will be mentioned later

I plan to split most of s1 episodes into 2 parts because they are very long. So we'll have about 20 chapters not including author notes and stuff

𝓖𝓵𝓸𝔀𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓻𝓮𝓰𝓪𝓻𝓭𝓼,

𝓙𝓾𝓵𝓲𝓾𝓼