finding my way back to you

Shivas guilt

Seeing Raavis condition shocked him to the core. He had known his chipkali since childhood but never once did he see her break. He had always seen her bubbly and cheery side. She was the girl that would bring a smile on everyone's face. Seeing her break because of him and his family made him speechless. He had layed her in what used to be their room.
Their room which used to be their store room had so many memories. From fighting will each other to him falling for her. A part of him felt at peace to see her in their room.
He also felt uneasy and guilty that he was a reason for her pain. He had always misunderstood her or assumed things without thinking. It was always his anger that messed things up. While a part of him always knew this , he was truly shocked to see the impact his family had on Raavi. While he had often been their during his families interactions with her, seeing raavis calmness and his respect for his family never made him react.

Shiva was pacing back and forth not knowing how to even talk to her. He had broke her. She had also given her a reality check. Since his childhood he had put his older brother and his sister in law on a super human pedestal. He realized that perhaps putting anyone on that pedestal is not healthy. He had hurt his relationship with his wife because of his inability to understand her and make their relationship a priority. He had always heard about how daughter in laws have to balance so many relationships, but he realized it was his responsibility to balance his relationships too. Raavi should not be the only one to bear the burden of the blames. It was his fault and his  inability to speak up against his family that then in this situation.

He looked at Raavi and promised her that he would for the first time fight for their relationship and make that the priority for them. He promised to never let her cry or break again. He promised to be her protector forever. He believed that this was his chance to prove his love and what his chipkali means to him.

He had no idea where to even go when it came to his family. He knew they had flaws but he never accepted them and held them accountable. He only held raavi accountable me. He reflected on his past behaviors with her and felt horrible. Shiva felt lost at how to navigate life for himself and to put himself and their relationship into this new journey.

He knows this will not be easy but after seeing his raavi in pain and her fears he became determined to find a way to navigate all the aspects of his life.

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Hey guys ! Thank you for the motivation and support it truly means a lot. I was scared writing this chapter has I have not written  in so long so I felt scared to potentially ruin the story. Additionally, while I do not believe in doing shiva vs. raavi, I have always connected more to raavi as a person because I see a lot of myself in her. Hence, it may appear that I am raavi biased but I do care a lot for shiva too, so I wrote this chapter about shiva do the best of my ability. I wish I do shiva and raavi justice in this alternative universe.
Thank you for the love and support and I will see you guys in the next update!❤️