Delicate Hearts | a Collection of Short Stories

Loves me, Loves me not

I was a new student and a transferee in Mt. Abbey Catholic High School when I met him. We were in the same year but in different sections; I was in section A, while he was in Section C. But, one day, our teacher couldn't make it to classes due to personal reasons. So, on that one specific day, our classes merged. 

He was my seatmate. 

At first, I was hesitant to introduce myself; I somehow felt that he was too. I could tell from how we both acted awkwardly towards each other. The first two classes ended; I went to the cafeteria with my friends, and suddenly my second cousin Adrian came up to me. 

"Claire. I heard you're in the same class with my best friend", said he. 

"Who's your best friend?"

He pulled someone who was standing behind him. 

"This guy. I also heard that you haven't been introduced", 

"Dude!" he murmured. 

"Oh", literally, I was speechless. I didn't know what to say, nor how to react. 

"This is Sebastian O'brian; and she's Claire Mortel", he initiated a handshake. 

I looked at his hand; I was afraid to touch it. My heart was pounding. Nevertheless, I stood up and shook his hand. The moment I did, my heart was palpitating wildly. I felt my heart beat faster. I'm sweating and blood rushed into my cheeks, they felt warm; inevitably, I was blushing. 

My friends, and so was his started teasing us; some shrieked, others threw papers as they call us lovers; I didn't understand why. 

The next day, when I thought that day would be just as the other days, some things changed. For instance, since I was in section A, my classroom is the first room in the floor, closer to the stairs and the faculty; and whenever he and his friends passes by, they make all sorts of noise - screaming, exaggerated laughing, cheering. Whenever it catches my attention, they do them louder. 

It continued for another week, and another - then it suddenly stopped. Initially, I felt a little uneasy. Because, when it stopped, its when I realized, I like him. Ever since I first met him. I ignored it, well, because I don't believe in love, nor love at first sight. Yet, I confirmed that I do when suddenly breathing seemed so hard to do whenever I hear his voice, when suddenly moving seemed impossible whenever I see him coming. I got to know this feeling a minute too late, now it seemed like he doesn't like me anymore. 

But then again, I realized, I only assumed he liked me. Maybe he didn't. That's when I was nudged back to my senses, and decided to put it all behind me. 

An entire school year passed by; and on our 9th grade, we ended up in the same class - what were the odds, right? And not just that, we were seatmates, again. 

"Claire! Ugh! Its good to finally have someone I know in the same class with", distressed, he said. 

"Uh--hey," I threw a fake smile. 

I thought I have moved on, but honestly, not completely yet - or maybe not at all. I thought I have, but it turned out that I only have forgotten about him for awhile. But, seeing him then, and knowing that I was gonna see more of him, it all came back. I forced myself to just ignore it, and everyday, I try my best to not let it control me, or affect our relationship because it will be so awkward to seat with him for an entire school year if I let that happen. 

Naturally, we became good friends - it was better that way actually, and honestly I prefer it. But, of course, deep inside I still have feelings for him, and sometimes I wish he'd give me a sign that he does too.