Namjoon's pov:
Jin hyung see this cute little boy gave me this handwritten card, it's adorable isn't it? I heard jungkook say to jin hyung for which he replied Oh that little guy? He gave me 3 handwritten cards saying I'm his bias. That's so cute of him isnt it? Jin hyung answered back to jungkook then everyone else joined the conversation,talking about all the gifts letters they've got,feeling like a outsider with just 5 letters and zero gifts I walked in silence with the rest of the members, I mean yeah I know I should be happy I atleast got 5 letters,but hearing them talk about the love they're receiving I felt left out,I've been giving my everything,practising more so that i don't make mistakes in the performance so that I'm not the party spoiler kinds guy,I've been taking more care of my skin and applying more amount of make so that I look a bit less ugly according to me I'm doing everything right to get loved by the fans the way my fellow members do yet I'm not enough I Don't know where I'm lacking sometimes I feel I serious should have left this band and let them go,they deserve a better leader and a bandmate,someone who's more talented and handsome,not like me ugly always messes up the performance,breaks things,and always receive hate and I also feel the few amount of hate the band gets is because of me,an immature unfair leader.
Jin hyungs voice got me out of my thoughts that I didn't even realise we were already sitting in the car,and the manager hyung was all ready to drive back to the drom, you okay namjoon-ah? Jin hyung asked me followed by a worried look b yoongi hyung, I wanted to say no,tell him I'm not okay let all my overwhelming emotions out tell him about all the hate im gettin and is increasing day by day, and cry hugging hyung,but I Couldn't, jin and yoongi hyungs might be the two oldest members and most understanding,but I just couldn't tell them everything could I? because I'm the leader,Im supposed to be strong and supposed to take care of the members,I must be strong,having nothing else to do I gently shakin my head sideways and gave a small smile followed by IM COMPLETELY FINE HYUNG while the inside me was wanting to yell
NO HYUNG IM NOT OKAY I'M GETTING DEATH THREATS HELP ME HYUNG HELP ME....
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IM TRYING SOMETHING NEW,DO READ THIS AND KEEP READING IM SURE ILL NOT WASTE YOUR TIME,THIS BOOK WILL BE WORTH
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IDOL IN LOVE
FanfictionLiving as an idol is really tough, always under the camera lights, always practicing and constantly working on themselves and making themselves better to meet everyone's expectations, it's a tough life, so let's see how the life changes when an idol...
