Marry Me-A Countryhumans Retelling (China x Russia) (DISCONTINUED)

Chapter 7 - File the Papers

"You're kidding, 中国."

The air had suddenly turned cold, the room suddenly silent as Japan had been stunned by China's sudden decision. After all, there was no actual promise that China and Russia were actually wed, there was no way this was going to happen, China must have been joking.

"You're kidding," was all that the Japanese girl said, turning her head slightly to look at China continuing his stretches. China only closed his eyes, his reaction silent to Japan's disbelief.

"You're not kidding. Y-you can't. We can't. 本当! I-it's not legal! We didn't file papers!" Japan immediately freaked out a bit as her mouth suddenly became wide open. China finally opened his eyes for once during the whole situation. (本当-Hontō-really)

"Then file the papers." The man's voice was serious in his tone, Japan couldn't believe what she was hearing. China had done crazy things but she had never experienced him doing something like this. She was just completely silent, only letting out a few gasps and groans of incredulity.

"I mean, think about it, 日本. I started something last night. I'll look absolutely crazy if I don't finish it," China's simple response was as concise as it was descriptive and reasonable, but yet Japan was still skeptical of China's motives here. 

"Crazy? Are you kidding me?" 

The man finished his stretches, pulling his arms out and creating a bowing position with his hands, exhaling finally before getting up to walk around normally for once.

"We have to get out in front of this. If he thinks he can mess with me, screw him, 傻子." (傻子-Shǎzi-idiot)

"中国, this is such a manic response to such a insane situation!" Japan was obviously freaking out at this point, trying to talk her friend and client out of what seemed to be a huge mistake. 

"No, we have to change the story here, 日本!" China was walking to get a glass of water, swinging his arms around to communicate his point better. "It won't be forever, maybe like a month, maybe a few months. There isn't a string attaching us together!"

"中国, assuming this man doesn't have a life or a partner, and if we can get him onboard, what do we tell the world? You don't wanna be a joke, 中国." 

"I can't be the punchline, 日本. I have to tell them, 'nothing else has worked,'" China stared into the Japanese's eyes with a pleading expression. His voice became softer, begging for Japan to go through with her plans. "Maybe this will. You know what to do when that opportunity knocks only once?"

"Open the door and welcome it inside?"

"Run full speed and break that door down."

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"Wait, what?" Russia was obviously too taken aback by what Japan had asked of him that he didn't exactly understand the full severity of the situation at first. 

"Just do it for us, ロシア, it's not forever, we're not trying to lie to the world," Japan explained simply, her eyes staring directly into the Russian's. "We're removing that lie, that's what you did last night." Russia's expression seemed less than impressed with himself. (ロシア-Roshia-Russia)

"Oh, I did that?" The Russian pointed to himself as if to explain his point of the argument. "Look, I am just random man who was helping someone on stage!"

"It's a new thing! It was a moment where he chose you and you picked him. Remember, you could have said no."

"I don't even know who this Китай person is!" The man's voice progressively became slightly louder throughout the calm altercation, Russia rubbing his forehead in frustration. 

"ロシア, 中国 is an absolute legend. He had a harsh childhood, his parents were exploited and murdered and he had to fight to live. Now he's north of 35 in an industry that tries to exploit everyone no matter the cost." Japan's voice became emotionless, her mouth speaking only straight factual information. "People like to see artists bare their souls and then immediately afterwards pull the floor under them."

"I'm not doing it." 

"Look, ロシア, we just need your cooperation here."

"How?"

"Just be beside him for 3 months, be his 'husband', his 'waifu'."

"I hate that word already, don't use it. What does Китай think about it?"

"It was his idea!" 

"He wanted to-"

"Yes. What if we offered you 10000000円?" At that moment, a napping American suddenly jolted awake, the sound of money being a wakeup call for him during the entire conversation. He suddenly perked up, standing up jolly as he popped out his back slightly.

"$10000, you say?" The American turned his attention towards the Japanese girl, her stance still in the same position as it had been for the last ten minutes.

"Only to him, not you, 馬鹿" the Japanese girl chuckled slightly. "He's not gonna give it to you, sorry for telling the truth." (馬鹿-Baka-fool(lol))

"Well, how about a different approach? Give him like a fundraiser or something, he'll take that."

The Japanese girl suddenly realized what was going on between the two and dared to ask the question on her mind, her voice chuckling a bit nervously.

"Wait, are you guys-"

"Ew, gross, no, no. I'm the guidance counselor, America, same school." The Japanese girl nodded her head in understanding before another idea came to her head.

"How about, a fundraiser for your math club?"

If Japan had a tail she would definitely be waving it by now.

"Wait, wait, don't answer that." The American suddenly ran over to pitch his own idea. "How about, instead of three months, it's six months, but it's like a new math wing?" Both Japan and Russia were chuckling a bit now by America's utter ridiculousness. "I'm just thinking about the children, Ruski."

"This is just ridiculous. No one will believe he would go from Монголия to me," the Russian explained. (Монголия-Mongoliya-Mongolia)

"Fair point."

"Well, the thing is, that's exactly what he did." 

"Counterpoint!"

"Look, ロシア, we're not asking you two to be in love. You're just getting together and if you fall for each other, グレート, if it doesn't-" (グレート-Gurēto-Great)

"This will not end well, comrade-"

"Not with that attitude, Ruski, come on!"

"Then it doesn't have to, ロシア!" The Japanese girl's expression became more pleading, her voice a bit louder and argumentative as Japan tried to argue for what China was trying to ask from her. "We will manage the media until everything goes back to normal."

"I have дочь. I don't want to involve her in something like this." 

"We will guarantee you, we're not going to invade on your privacy, ロシア."

"How does it feel like to be a nobody?" So much for that.

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They never, no, they never

This forever, ever, ever, ever, ever

Ain't nobody do it better, better, better

And it's only getting better