A Beginning, If You Will

My Loyal Royal (Guard)

    I used to dream about the cavalry captain Mori, dream of fighting alongside him in battle, the two of us immortalized as heroes. My dreams, however, were cut in half and thrown into the nearest hearth around, the people surrounding it not even batting an eye. I was not assigned a knight into the battlefield, rather, I was assigned to be your bodyguard. Sure they said being the prince’s royal guard was supposed to be a very honorable title and a highly coveted one at that, but I didn’t want it. I didn’t know you nor did I care to. I resented you for that, you know? I blamed you for not letting me live out my dreams. 

    I tried so hard to hate you, truly I did. Obviously I only showed my disdain for you by being overly formal and rarely speaking to you unless necessary, but I think you got the message. No matter how much I tried to hate you, seethe at your very existence, I couldn’t. You were too good, a light in my deep ocean waters. At first I felt bothered, too bright I would say. Now, I wish I would have given your light a chance sooner.

    I did warm up to you, forgetting my deep sorrowful ocean. Even though I was submerged, I could breathe happily underwater knowing you were there. You were so kind and so stupid, endearingly so. How could I not be enamored? I had almost forgotten my drowning feelings under the water. Almost. Right as I had made my peace and tried to swim up, your guiding light had disappeared. 

    We were with your sisters, the queen and the princess. The throne room wasn’t too packed and it was relatively calm. That is, until that scum of the earth, that rule-following coward had been tossed before us. He claimed he was from a resistance, coming to warn us of a calamity about to hit our kingdom. What good was his warnings if he was already too late? Waiting for the formalities to finish, waiting with the guards. We could have had more time, we could have come out unscathed. We didn’t. 

    Our grand, glorious kingdom in the sky. A massive feat for human kind. Years worth of work and study and pain and determination left for ruin within an hour. Dizzying blue neon explosions rang out from the streets, the very base of our kingdom exploding underneath us. Sickening blues mixed with smoky grays and hungry yellows was all I could see. Mori had ordered us to take you all to safety. My priority was you. We got separated from your sisters. I didn’t care. Captain Mori was with us, then he wasn’t. A final heroic act, protecting a child as a massive castle pillar crushed him. We ran, I couldn’t think. My only thoughts were to protect you. 

    Suddenly we were surrounded. I fought them off but we were vastly outnumbered. My back was turned and you called out my name. A sword entered my vision and before I could react and block it, you had flung yourself in front of me. Red. Red, red, red, red. Too much red from you. You were dripping red and practically pouring it everywhere. I looked over to my left. That was your arm, wasn’t it? I couldn’t think from that point on, instinct taking over. Everything was a blur, even more than it already was. I carved a red path for our escape. I think at some point I draped my cape you made me over your shoulder to cover the wound, I don’t remember. We got on a cloud, it fell as if it was a brick being tossed into the sky rather than a fluffy one depicted in fairy tales.

    You wouldn’t wake up but you were alive. You are alive. It’s been a couple days since the fall, but you’re alive. You still won’t wake up. When will you light up my deep waters again? I fear if it isn’t soon, I’ll sink too deep where no light may ever hope to reach me.