A Fresh Ending

Chapter 8

(Steve's POV)

I met Y/N in a tiny cafe outside Portland, Oregon almost two months ago. I remember the smell of rain in the air. The wind had picked up moments before she stepped inside, causing her being to be in shambles. I remembered chuckling to myself, watching her push those gorgeous locks from her face, while trying to put the rest of herself back together. I couldn't pull my eyes away from her the entire time we shared that cafe with the rest of the patrons. I knew I needed her in my life, but I didn't know how.

Sitting in my room, gazing down the dark the night after she told me she needed space, I still didn't know how I wanted her in my life. What I did know was that I couldn't live without her. I knew she was different than Ann and Noa when I couldn't bring myself to hurt her in any way. I often wondered in my infatuation with Noa was due to my inability to decipher what I felt for Y/N. Losing myself in Noa meant I didn't have to deal with anything else.

I allowed Ms. White to take Y/N her meals for the next few days, keeping my distance as requested. I busied myself with work I fell behind on, thankful to my men for picking up the slack. I visited the other house, seeing how the renovations were coming along. The basement needed to be upgraded before storing new product.

I talked to Ann while away, informing her to stay away from the house and Y/N. She didn't like my request, but I reminded her who was in charge. Wife or not, she would end up in one of those cells if she defied me in any way.

After five days of no interaction with Y/N, I decided enough was enough. I woke up early that morning, texting my staff, minus a few guards, to take the day off. I wanted the house empty, allowing me to take care of my sweet girl. I wanted to show her that I wasn't a monster, no matter the circumstances that brought us here.

Ms. White was waiting for me in the kitchen when I arrived home. She leaned against the counter, holding a hot cup of coffee in her hands, scowling in my direction. Her eyes followed me as I shuffled into the room.

"What?" I mumbled, pouring a cup of coffee for myself.

"Nothing," she responded, sipping the black gold.

"Mmmhmm," I replied, placing myself next to her. "Say what you want to say."

"Do you love her?" Ms. White spit out.

"What?" I exclaimed, choking a bit on my coffee.

"You heard me. Steve..." She stopped speaking, placing her cup on the counter while turning to face me. "You care about her, obviously, but it's more than that. You married Ann, and you have treated Y/N better than you ever treated her. So, do you love her?"

"I can't answer that because if I did, I would want her to hear those words first," I responded, trying to keep everything together.

"Yeah," she breathed, strolling out of the kitchen. She turned back around just before exiting. 

 "You better not hurt her like those other women. I keep to myself when it comes to your world, but that girl..." she expressed, pointing in the direction of Y/N's room. "Is special. She adores you and hates herself because of it."

I watched the woman leave, before heading to my room. I knew since day one that things were different with Y/N. I never understood why. The idea of never seeing her again didn't sit well with me. Love always seemed unreal, but with my situation with Y/N, it didn't seem so farfetched.

I took my time showering and getting dressed for the day. I knew Ms. White was down, helping my sweet girl do the same. I didn't have much planned for my day with Y/N, knowing I would have to convince her to even step outside her room. I had to be gentle with how I spoke, keeping those strong emotions in check. Raising my voice to her wasn't an option, no matter how much she infuriated me.

I dressed in a pair of grey sweats and a black tee, placing a pair of wool socks on my feet. I exited my room, heading directly to the living room to throw a couple of logs onto the fire. I needed the house to be welcoming to help her relax around me. I walked into the kitchen, ready to prepare breakfast, finding Y/N bent over in the refrigerator. Her sheer white gown left zero to the imagination, immediately making me regret choosing her to wear it every day.

My body reacted instantly, causing pain to shoot through my body. I grimaced, automatically turning around, willing away the pain in my groin that was still healing from the damage inflicted by Noa weeks ago. I had received a few surgeries to repair said damage, with still another in my future. It would be a while before I could use my equipment for anything other than peeing.

A gasp escaped her lips, rendering me to face that beautiful woman. I missed seeing those gorgeous doe-like eyes, perfect little nose, and those kissable pink lips. My eyes traveled down her frame like always. Pain pulled me out of the trance. I did my best to hide it, but the concerned look on Y/N's face expressed my failure.

"Are you okay?" she questioned, walking around the counter towards me.

"Not really, but you don't have to worry about it. How are you?" I asked, taking her hand.

"Fine," she whispered, pulling her hand away. "I'm going to get some food, then go to my room."

I grabbed her wrist as she began to walk away. "Please, eat with me. I'll cook for the both of us."

"Steve, I..." She stuttered over her words. "I just can't..."

"Please, I gave you the space you wanted. I can't be away from you anymore. Plus, I'll make you whatever you want. Let me do this for you," I begged, cupping Y/N's face with my hand.

"I don't know..." she whispered. "I hated being away from you, but I hate more that you are married, and I killed those women."

"I don't love Ann. I need you to believe it," I assured her.

"What about Noa? Did you love her? I mean, you did sleep with her," she expressed, pulling from my grasp, and turning to face the island.

I sighed, setting my hands on her shoulders and placing my mouth next to her ear. I felt her body shiver against mine, making me regret getting close to her.

"Noa was a distraction," I admitted. "I didn't know how I felt about you, and I didn't want to admit that I felt anything. So, I tried to lose myself in her, to hide the fact I'm in love with you."

"You don't love me. You don't even know me," Y/N whimpered, tears cascading down her cheeks.

"I know I love you and want to get to know you. That's all that matters," I replied, shifting Y/N's body to face mine.

"All this is scary," she conveyed.

I nodded, "I know, it's scary for me because I've never really been in love."

She chuckled, "You're married."

"I told you Ann and I aren't like a real married couple," I informed her.

"I don't believe you just married her to help you with the lifestyle you live," she expressed, stepping backward. "A part of you had to love her to marry her."

I sighed, "Why can't you just believe me."

"Why should I? Look at where I am. I'm in the middle of nowhere with a man who sees me as food. I have these fucking bracelets that shock the hell out of me if I try to remove them. I wear these awful gowns every single day. I'm afraid to do or say something wrong because I know what happens when someone pisses Steve Kemp off. I hate being around you because I don't feel like myself. I'm scared," she admitted, wiping away her tears "I'm scared because I don't know who I am anymore."

I went to reach for her, but she pulled away, rushing off toward her room. I grimaced, hearing the door slam. I knew she was broken at the other place, but now I could see just how fragile she actually was. I promised her I would fix her not too long ago. It was now time to keep that promise.